Hi, GeminiGem of House Lannister ! My name is runningwolf04 and I am stopping by your port today with a review as a part of "Invalid Item"  and as a Power Review Captain.

Overall, I really enjoyed your poem, "The Terrible Gift" ! These are my thoughts... Please take what you can use to better the piece. If you make any changes, I would love to re-read.

Title/Theme
The title of this piece fits well with the theme of it. To think of breast cancer as an unwanted gift that you don't want and would like to "return" is unique. If only it was that easy to get rid of cancer, so many lives would not have been affected so horrifically by something so devastating.

Imagery
I can feel your pain and suffering with these words. You convey the whirlwind of emotions that you feel as you deal with the diagnosis and what your treatments will bring you.

Rhythm/Flow
This is a free verse poem but you do a great job making it flow well (which can be the hardest thing to do with free verse). You do this by using several poetic devices, including repetition.

Rhyme
There is no rhyme in this free verse poem, and I don't think it is really necessary as it flows just fine and is very poetic without it.

Structure
I like the repetition you use in this free verse poem. That is the only real structure you give the piece and it works well.

Diction
Your word choices do an excellent job of describing the myriad emotions that one feels when you are faced with something like breast cancer. The roller coaster ride is real (I just had to go through ultrasound and mammograms to make sure I did NOT have breast cancer and even THAT was a roller coaster - thankfully everything was okay). I'm just glad that it seems you are a survivor (going based off your handle).

Grammar
I found no grammatical errors in this piece. Well done!

Most Liked
It was an unwanted gift
with terrible powers;
to break my loved one’s heart,
to break our bank account,
to break my spirit,
to break my very existence.

This stanza is powerful. It communicates the power that breast cancer has on the individual.

Personal Thoughts
This is a very well written personal account of breast cancer. Do you have a poem that also relays being a survivor of breast cancer? Perhaps you can link it to this one to show your success?

Overall, I really enjoyed this piece and I look forward to reading more of your work. Well done and Write On! (I'm glad that you shared your story so that others can take solace in the fact that they aren't alone in the battle that they face when they get a diagnosis of breast cancer - or any cancer for that matter.)



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .