Hello Hollyda31,

Welcome to writing.com!

I found you in the "Noticing Newbies" forum and was intrigued by how you described yourself there so popped over to your profile to find out more.

I thought you made an excellent analogy here: "Moving from one ship to another was like moving from Seattle to Portland."

I didn't notice any grammatical, spelling or other errors.

You did an excellent job communicating urgency and peril.

Overall, I enjoyed your story and the ending left me thinking about not only your story but the state and future of modern politics and civilization in general. So that was great.

It was kind of confusing to me in some ways though. I had to re-read some sections several times to sort things out, especially at the beginning. I think I read the first few paragraphs five or six times.

I wish I could give you a specific recommendation to make it easier for future readers. Nothing in particular comes to mind except to make things a bit clearer. But maybe it's not your story. Maybe it was just a weird thing with me today. I read a lot, and I like sci fi and am not usually easily confused but maybe today's an exception. I have been on the computer more than usual today.

Anyway, regardless of the confusion I experienced, I really enjoyed your story.

Thank you for a thought provoking read!
PWheeler

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My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .