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by A Guest Visitor
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*Delight* Happy Poetry Month Troy! I found this interesting haiku in your port. The theme is more suited to a senryu technically as Haiku is more about nature. The format is similar though. *Wink*

Your message made me smile when I read the advise in the last line. *Smile* Makes sense.
Your three line poem has the sense of a warning and describes the quality of warmongers. The verb "crave" is vivid and I like the strong sound of the g and x sounds.

Now as to the form, if you call it haiku or senryu, I can be a bit picky as generally these japanese forms contrast two images and do not really use sentence structures, but rather phrases. Capital letters and punctuation are rarely used as well. You want to let the reader discover for themselves the aha moment of your observation. It is quite an art to create one well.

It is more than just the amount of syllables per line, and that you have done just fine! Keep to the present tense as well.

Still, as a poem it speaks wisdom and has a strong vibration and flow. Thanks for sharing your wise vision. *Star*

eyestar
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