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Review #4408180
Viewing a review of:
 
carving  [13+]
just life as I know it
by Mastiff
Review of carving  
Review by Mina~
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Mastiff

It's been a pleasure to review your story "carving"  on behalf of "The WDC Angel Army" 

This review reflects my opinion only, and I am not a writing expert. I do hope you find something that is interesting or helpful to you.

*Butterflyb* Initial Impression: I like this thoughtful poem about the principal of life. The concept is unique.

*Idea*The poem:I like the narrators thought process. You painted beautifully about life. I like the way you painted it. Your words are very pure, honest but very true. I especially like the lines

as i got older i got better.
trimming was easy.
just don't dig too deep.

Yes, with age comes experience and skills. We become more empathetic and we can carving our own path easily.

*Cut* Suggestions: Capitalize the first letters at the beginning of each line and all the i. For example when i was young i wanted to carve you. I found some spelling mistake “triiming” “instict.” “acedemic.” otherwise it is wonderful poem.


*FlowerV**Vine2* Mina *Vine1**FlowerV*
*Grass**Grass**Grass**Grass**Grass**Grass**Grass**Grass*

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