INTRODUCTION

Hello Patrick McDonagh ,

I found your item "Invalid Item"  in the review request thread, and having just enjoyed another one of your pieces I thought I'd leave another review for you.

WHAT I LIKED:

Questions

I have found myself asking a lot of the questions that were posed in the piece, though I'll be the first to admit, I haven't asked them with nearly so much eloquence as was presented here.

Favorite stanza

There was one stanza in particular that really stuck out for me, and it was as follows:

So many questions that I seek
and lies I have been told.
Yet looking deeply for the truth
is only for the bold.

Aside from being a great example of the tone, flow, and meter that I really enjoyed about the poem, I loved the sentiment here. It's something that I think just about everyone could relate to deeply at a minimum of one point in their lives. This encompasses answers that we all tell ourselves we want, as well as the issue with getting them. Some of us aren't brave enough to actually seek those truths and the way you've expressed that is more sympathetic than accusatory - it leaves a little bit of ambiguity as well regarding you as the narrator. The reader doesn't know if you are ready or able to receive those truths in your life, anymore than they are willing to receive them in their own. It's a moment of existential bonding between the poet and their audience that I just really appreciate.



I really don't have any= complaints regarding the piece. It reads aloud beautifully, I loved the sentiments behind it. I would love to read more pieces like it.

If I had one suggestion it might be to make the allusion to God more subtle, because while everyone can relate to the feelings in the poem, the message of God does feel more targeted. That being said, however, I think if a higher power is where you draw your inspiration, there's no harm in leaving that bit in there even if it makes it a tad less versatile for specific audiences.

CONCLUSION:

I'm really glad to have read this piece. Thank you so much for sharing it, and I hope that I get to read more of your work in the future.

Sincerely,

-Cat
















My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .