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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4447899
Review #4447899
Viewing a review of:
 Musing by the blue sea  [E]
The past comes back.
by jaya
Review by Cubby
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
         *Pumpkin2* Greetings, jaya ! I found your item, "Musing by the blue sea" , in Random Reviews and decided to review it. *Smile*

         First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. *Smile* Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.

My First Impression
         Oh, what a delight to read. *Smile* I loved reading through your unrhymed stanzas, each one a clear visual!

Punctuation/Grammar/Typos
         I found nothing to report. *Wink*

Suggestions/Thoughts
         The only thing to consider (because it's certainly up to you) is to uncapitalize the beginning of your lines, other than the ones that begin a new thought or phrase. I'll use Stanza 6 as an example:

A destination that might
Bring their dreams to realize
A happiness that might last
Beyond the daily cares?
(consider)
A destination that might
bring their dreams to realize
a happiness that might last
beyond the daily cares?

         *Starb* My favorite lines
                             I let my thoughts to wander.
                             They flew in different directions

*Thumbsup* Nicely written and a beautiful piece! *Smile*

Have a great day and...
*Pumpkin2*  K e e p on W r i t i n g ! *Pumpkin2*
~Cubby ")
Ghost House Simply Positive signature.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 10/27/2018 @ 12:49am EDT
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4447899