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 Review #4449670 |
| (4.0)  Greetings, fyn  ! I found your item, "Pique" , in Random Reviews and decided to review it.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.My First Impression I read this piece first and then looked up the meaning of pique: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pique: to arouse anger or resentment in : irritate I applaud you for pulling this together with the prompted words, emerald, goat, broccoli, salt. Good job! Suggestions You might want to consider omitting the first word, A in the first line. A salted feelings of emerald emotions: consider... Salted feelings of emerald emotion I also omitted the semi-colon, just for flow into the third line, but that, of course, is up to you. Just a humble afterthought. or perhaps... A salted feeling of emerald emotions I think it flows better without both feeling and emotion being plural. One or the other works though. Thoughts I like the rhyming of emotion and devotion. It adds to the free verse and really works well. I also admire how you used the emotion pique as irritation toward the boyfriend. It's amazing how the little things can irritate us so much more than they should.   My favorite lines (even though I picked at it a little  , I love these lines!)A salted feelings of emerald emotions:  Nicely written! I hope my suggestions were helpful. Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! ~Cubby ")    My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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