Hi IceSkatingSugarCube ,

I'm glad I read this work of yours. It is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "The Aluminum Steed"  on behalf of "The Rockin' Reviewers" . This poem was chosen for review because it was the one posted before mine for Rising Stars' "I Write in 2019" .

First Impression/Thoughts:
Aha, my very first impression had little to do with the poem but rather the fact that you're entering your own contest??? That made me do a double-take and I had to check to see if you were actually the same person. I suppose it'll work if it's meant to be a sample, or the contest is being judged by a different person. Anyway on to the poem itself.

Creativity/Impact:
It's always going to require a healthy dose of creativity to effectively paint a bicycle in the reader's mind without using any of the taboo words. You've done a wonderful job here, and this deserves to be a showcase item on the contest to inspire would-be contestants how it should and could be done.

Message/Theme:
Bicycles are wonderful, environmentally-friendly contraptions!

Technique/Technical Notes:
These are just my thoughts and observations. I may not have read the work the way you intended. Please decide for yourself if these comments are helpful to you; if not, feel free to disregard them.

Title -
The title is the first thing that prospective readers will see. 'The Aluminium Steed' is an excellent choice, but you may want to check your spelling again!

Grammar/Wording -
I noticed little that jarred or confounded the reading (other than the spelling typo in the title mentioned earlier). This is always a sign of good writing. Punctuation is a little scattered and inconsistent, but personally I'm not particular about that in a poem. Some others may be, however, so you may want to consider plonking down some of those periods and commas.

Form/Flow -
Rhyming couplets are a great choice here. They impart a sense of childish wonder that perfectly complements the feel, word choices as well as the subject matter.

Emotion/Imagery -
The mood of the poem is mainly established though the rhyme scheme and excellent choice of diction. My favourite part is the last line "boy oh boy, my legs are pooped!"

Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:
An excellent poem with its unique voice and take on the subject.


Thank you for a wonderful read!


Keep writing! Wishing you all the best,

Azrael



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .