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Review #4485295
Viewing a review of:
I Write In 2019   [13+]
Lots of creative pursuits in 2019.
by 💙 Carly
         Review for entry/chapter: "Garden Glory" 
Review by ruwth
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)

May God bless both of us as we grow as writers together!


Carly, As a fellow participant in "I Write in 2019" , you know why I am here! LOL

Title:

Your current Title is "Garden Glory". I think I might prefer a more intriguing title. One that comes to mind is: "Grabbing My Hoe" or some other gardening action. I think it would fit a bit better with the idea expressed in your poem.

The Main Course:

You did a great job figuring out the 24 syllables. As I am trying to create a clover lawn, I can truly appreciate your use of the prompt word: travail.

How creative! It is not an idea that would have sprung to mind for me but it is perfect!

Your last line falls a tad flat for me. How about "Dreaming of" floral glory... or "Hoping for"...

Or even words a bit more flowery than "floral glory".

Summary:

I suspect "Garden Glory" does reflect something you hope for in real life. I know I am looking forward to fields of clover! *Wink*




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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 05/18/2019 @ 5:43pm EDT
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