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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4510619
Review #4510619
Viewing a review of:
 
Gnash Steps Out  [18+]
Ever feel really stuck? (A PersonITfication Entry)
by Mastiff
Review of Gnash Steps Out  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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Hello Mastiff ,

I just read your short story "Gnash Steps Out, which I found in the "I Write in 2019 forums and wanted to share my personal thoughts with you.

Disclaimer: Please remember that the following suggestions are based off of my own opinion and personal interpretation of your work. Feel free to take and/or toss out any of my suggestions.

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*Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider* Overall Impressions: *Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider*


I enjoyed this piece of flash fiction personifying the gargoyle. I have been mulling over my own piece for this and it was wonderful to view another entry for it.

I really enjoyed the point of view you placed within this piece with him over-hearing everything around him and how it made him feel.

Giving him his own desire to be set free from his initial design was a wonderful touch along with hatred and view of those around him.

Your ending was quite delightful as well. It made me laugh in joy for Gnash to not only get his wish but to take out a few of those who annoyed him as well.


*Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider* Suggestions: *Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider*


Only error I saw was this sentence:

*Bullet* Perhaps that was the reason the son had added the him, a Gothic feature, to the building.

I think "the" was a simple typing error.


*Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider* Additional Comments: *Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider*


Great entry! Good luck in "Invalid Item and all of your endeavors for "I Write in 2019!!

I enjoyed reading your work and hope my review was helpful and encouraging!

*Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider*


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*Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider* "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group*Spider**Pumpkin2**Spider*
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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 10/20/2019 @ 2:09pm EDT
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