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Review #4529397
Viewing a review of:
 I WOULD RATHER  [E]
a sorty of a man/woman wanting the woman/man he/she loves.
by bLackSphere77
Review of I WOULD RATHER  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Dear bLackSphere77 ,

I'm reviewing your poem on behalf of the WDC Angel Army.

I got to the last two lines of this poem and felt something at work there. The first part of the poem flipping statements of would you rather didn't speak to me the way those last lines did.

Instead of just asking random questions with no answer, meditate on the expression of that flower and 'will you make me the center of you...' beautiful expression for wanting to be the center of someone's universe.

I like the notion of that flower and being supported by another. Two as one. The metaphors relating to this kind of relationship sing to me. Take those last two lines and make a poem out of that.

Sometimes when we start writing randomly, words flow to places the mind's eye can see. Keep exploring those feelings and who they're for and implore, implore, implore to give us more. More striking expressions with metaphors and you'll have hearts singing your praises.

Just write on and don't give up,

Brian

Non-Animated Angel Army Signature



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