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Review #4567905
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Review by Choconut
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: | (4.5)
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Hi jjdel4611,

I found this item on the Read A Newbie page and was instantly drawn to your title and description.

Please remember the following views are purely my own, and any advice is given with the sole intention of being helpful.

*StarV* The first thing to mention is the emotion you have put into writing this. It fills every word and washes over the reader in spades. By the time I reached the end, I had a lump in my throat. You capture the emotion so well. It breaks our hearts when we lose our pets. It is a pain like no other.

*StarV* I like how you don't reveal that you are speaking to a pet until the final paragraph. When I read, "You were sick and I was beside myself." I realised your best friend was not human. It's such a sad story but, I think, it's one that most people will relate to.

*Starv* The only query I have is of your description of this being a poem. I've tried to figure it out in that context, but it doesn't have the feeling of poetry. Not even prose poetry. I would say it is a tribute written for your best friend. It is prose, and that is as descriptive as you need to be.

*Starv* In terms of technicalities, your punctuation and grammar are excellent. This makes it so much easier to read. It brings out the emotion even more.

*Starv* You have a real talent for tugging at your readers' heartstrings. You grabbed me at the beginning and pulled me close. I got lost in your narrative, and I felt incredibly moved in the end. I am sure this piece is written from your own experience. It definitely sounds as though you know what you are talking about.

Fantastic writing, jjdel4611. You are definitely one to watch!

Keep writing!

Choconut

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