%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4568786 |
 | A dream, but real  [13+] A fictional story about the narrator's dream. {The rest is on top of the story.}  |
| (4.5)  Greetings, Alisha P. ☕! I discovered this treasure on the Read & Review page.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.What I Liked  Wow!  This is so intriguing. I was into it big-time and kept thinking what an awesome imagination you have. I've never read anything like this. The ending floored me. This is so deep. I loved it! But I also feel a little frightened by it. Did you actually dream any of this? I mean, so you fictionalized your dream? I am still flabbergasted by it. Wow.Suggestions to Consider Line 2 : And whats dreaming is real. Missing an apostrophe and comma.  And what's dreaming, is real. Line 19 : I looked at the sky I had once fallen… Did you forget a word, like maybe from?I looked at the sky I had once fallen from…Final Thoughts I'll be thinking about this piece for a long time. It may not be for everyone, but I was mesmerized by it. Have you thought of actually expanding this into a book? The visuals are amazing. I often play a game with my grandkids called Dix-it. The cards in this game remind me of the images you visually paint. I look forward to reading more by you in the future! Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "
You responded to this review 09/05/2020 @ 8:41am EDT