Okay, love the message! The problem is the package it is wrapped in. The punctuation is erratic and illogical. The line breaks only make sense about half the time. I think a little consistency would make the message easier to follow and prettier. Perhaps if you formatted this more as prose it would work better this presentation is more like an attempt at poetry and the structure used does not work towards conveying the message. I would organize this into complete sentences with proper punctuation and from there into paragraphs that work together to convey complete thoughts. Once again I love the message and in truth the wording, it is just the presentation that confuses me.