Hi Terrence, Wow a science lesson and a well-crafted poem. My lucky day. I'm here to read and review your

STATIC

In Significance  (E) A reflection on our place in the universe #2182548 by Words Whirling 'Round

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Title and appearance on the page: This is the come on to pull the reader in and you nailed it. The title - compelling, the photo - gorgeous, and the neat presentation of quatrains, just long enough not to be intimidating.

Form: Nine quatrains made up of 8 syllable lines with L2 and L4 of each stanza carrying assonant end-rhyme.

Texture, rhythm, word choice, sonics: The poem reads fluidily out loud. The assonant rhyme is apparent yet subtle. Words chosen that speak of scientific discovery but doesn't send the reader to google.

Suggestions:I have no suggestions for improvement. Though if you really want to play more with this poem, maybe finding an alternative word for galaxy which is repeated in short proximity without the sonic impact of repetition as does the word billions above.

What I liked: I liked the vastness portrayed against the miniscule narrator. Bringing the expanse down to a speck of humanity.

This is only one person's opinion, use what you find helpful and ignore the rest. I very much enjoyed this read.


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .