Hi Nitraits, Your The Dancer from 2019 came up on Read and Review and I am here to share my thoughts. You've probably forgotten all about this piece.

My first impression was that the entry was very short and though I normally don't review prose, it wouldn't take much time to read and come up with something to note. So I always begin with the title, the words that draw the reader to the piece. Is it unique or interesting? In this case, it is pretty generic and probably won't be much of a come-on for the random reader. Maybe a dancer.

Prose, telling a complete story in 73 words is pretty impressive. You set the stage, you expand it, a crisis happens, the crisis is resolved and the audience is satisfied. The end. Right at the beginning you surprise the reader, the dancer was a chihuahua. That brought a smile to my face. Another surprise when it fell. The smile went away. The owner intervenes discovers and corrects the problem and the show goes on. That's a plot with characters.

There are some technical notes:
First sentence: I believe the commas after "began" and after "legs" should be removed and a comma should be inserted after the word chihuahua. Also the word "and" should be inserted between "legs and hips".
Second sentence: there should be a comma after owner.
Third sentence: Hind "legs" don't have pads, however hind "paws" do. Substitute the word "leg" with "paw".

This is all just one person's opinion. Use what you find helpful and ignore the rest.

All in all, even with minor punctuation and body part error, this was a delightful read. Thank you.

Tink


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .