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Review #4714219
Viewing a review of:
 
Steady Rhythm  [E]
My collection of poems and short texts for challenge, conests, activities.
by PiriPica
         Review for entry/chapter: "Peppermint Kisses" 
Review of Steady Rhythm  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Dear PiriPica

"Peppermint Kisses"

I discovered this poem on your blog today and was drawn in by the evocative title, from the prompt-themed contest. It's a delicate piece that beautifully captures a wintry scene infused with longing and nostalgia. The poem has its strengths, and areas where it could be refined for an even more impactful experience.

The style of "Peppermint Kisses"  is lyrical and vivid, effectively paints a picture of a cold, secretive rendezvous. The imagery of "Peppermint kisses hidden in the dark" immediately sets the tone, and the contrast between the crisp air and "secretive hearts" creates a palpable sense of mystery and desire.

Your theme of longing and separation is noticeably prevalent throughout the poem. It explores that idea of love in winter, where the weather mirrors emotional distance between these lovers. This theme is a powerful one and resonates with me on the level where I too have experienced the bittersweetness of love.

You’ve made effective use of sensory details, helping this reader connect in that wintry atmosphere. Phrases like "Only a breeze moves" and "Puff of air so still" provide a sense of quiet/hush, enhancing that connective detail to the scene. The contrast between the cold exterior and the warmth of the hearth adds depth to the imagery, as I’m familiar with this atmosphere.

Looking deeper, there are a few areas that could be improved to enhance the overall impact of the poem. One thought is to consider revising the line "Owls hoot like spies." While it adds an element of mystery, it could be made more vivid by describing the owl's hooting in a way that directly connects to the theme of secrecy and longing. You can persuade that hooter with this narrative perception using a similar word that more evocatively suggests its utterance/ presence (they also stare with that mobile neck). Just not ‘hoot’?

Secondly, the transition from the wintry scene to "chocolate and warmth" could be made smoother. Exploring the emotional journey of your characters as they move from the cold darkness to the cozy hearth could deepen the poem's emotional resonance. Just a bridge to transport?

Lastly, the poem concludes with "Polar opposites are the sources of joy," which is a thought-provoking line. It might benefit from further exploration or clarification to ensure readers fully grasp its significance. Perhaps, reconsider its meaning to the author and offer a way to express to the unknowing reader a way that they might fully interpret, feed this into the overall context of the poem’s meaning.

In conclusion, "Peppermint Kisses" is a heartfelt poem that skillfully captures the essence of a wintry romance. For me, nostalgically. With some refinements in imagery and thematic development, i see potential to create an even more immersive and emotionally resonant experience to connect with your fans. Keep up the excellent work. I look forward to reading more of your poetry in the future.

Sincerely,

Brian
Super Power Reviewer
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