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Review #4718008
Viewing a review of:
 
***  [E]
love poetry
by LovelyLizzy
Review of ***  
Review by Brian KC
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Dear LovelyLizzy ,

This poem, 🌟🌟🌟, exudes a beautiful blend of romance and inspiration, capturing the essence of love and longing. Here are some insights and suggestions to consider:

1. Imagery and Symbolism: The poem begins with a striking image of darkness and the absence of light, setting a somber tone. The use of "favorite star in the night sky" is a powerful symbol, suggesting that the subject of the poem is a guiding light in the speaker's life. You could expand on this symbolism by describing the qualities or actions that make the person the "favorite star."

2. Engage the Senses: Poetry thrives on sensory details. Consider adding sensory elements to immerse the reader. For example, describe the night sky in more detail, evoke the feeling of holding hands, or paint a vivid picture of the kiss. Engaging the senses helps readers connect on a deeper level.

3. Metaphorical Language: Explore metaphors and similes to enhance the depth of your poem. You could compare the person to other elements in the universe, like constellations or galaxies, to emphasize their significance.

4. Rhythmic Flow: Poetry often benefits from a rhythmic flow. Experiment with the cadence and structure of your lines. The first two lines, for example, create a sense of contrast that can be emphasized through pacing.

5. Emotional Resonance: While the poem already conveys strong emotions, you can expand on the feelings the speaker has. What is it about this person that makes them the favorite star? What emotions are evoked when they're near?

6. Title: Consider giving your poem a title that provides a hint about its theme. A well-chosen title can draw readers in and give them a sense of what to expect. It also acts as a hook.

7. Editing and Revising: Poetry often benefits from multiple revisions. Take time to re-read and refine your work. Play with different word choices and structures until you're satisfied with the result. I’ve gotten closer to language and its varied definitions and uses as I’ve grown as writer. It’s truly an immersive experience to chase synonyms, word origins, and more; it’s in this research that bolsters our style and voice as poets.

In this poem, you've started to craft a beautiful, evocative piece. With a bit of refinement and exploration, it can become an even more impactful expression of romance and inspiration. Keep writing and experimenting with your style to create a deeper connection with your readers.

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer

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