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A WDC Power Review


Hi rodrigotfleite. I found your offering on the Read & Review section.

I'm JACE - House Targaryen , and I have the honor of reading and reviewing your offering "Invalid Item" .

I invite your attention to the comments below. Please bear in mind these notes are from one on the outside looking in; ultimately only you can decide what's right for your story.

*Note1* Overall Impression. I'm guessing the English is not your primary language. If that's the case, I think you do pretty well with it. However, there are still lessons to learn. Some of the technical things will be listed below.

Correcting these will help you gain readers. Had this been a much longer article, I probably would have passed it by. You did well to create a space between paragraphs--that makes reading much easier.

*Exclaim* Technical and Editorial Considerations. In this section I normally list those areas that relate specifically to the mechanics of your writing--punctuation, grammar, spelling, etc.

         *Bullet* Your biggest issue is the presentation of your writing. When typing your sentences, always add a space after a period (.) or comma (,). The spacing helps the reader process what you're trying to say by pausing while reading at the proper time.  

         *Bullet* Use a Spell Check program. Fewer things cause a reader to stumble than misspelled words.    

         *Bullet* Some of your phrasing seems off to a native English speaker. BUT, I understand that is part of learning a new language and will come with time. Grammar is a very hard thing to learn--I still have issues when writing that I must edit out.    

*Star* My Rating.  4.0. 

*Heart* Thank you for sharing this offering. Please accept these comments as offered in friendship and support. They are but my humble opinion.


Reviewed by
JACE

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