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Review #4726885
Viewing a review of:
 Texting  [E]
A poem I wrote for a class
by Shawn
Review of Texting  
Review by JACE
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
An Angel Army Review


Hi Shawn . Good morning. I found your offering in the Read & Review section.

I'm JACE , and I have the honor of reading and reviewing your offering "Texting" .

I invite your attention to the comments below. Please bear in mind these notes are from one on the outside looking in; ultimately only you can decide what's right for your story.

*Note1* Overall Impression. How very today of your poem. Not long after I got cell phones for my four kids some years back, I would check the usage of them. Just because....

Where I and my wife might use 30 to 50 texts per month, my middle (and very popular) daughter was texting 800 to 1000 times per month. I suppose I've "upped my texting game" these days as it is more convenient (and quieter) than calling.

I found your story a little hard to follow at first--I had to re-read it to figure out who was texting who. May I suggest you treat the texts as dialogue (which they are) but place each text in italics.

And now I'm thinking about how many texts my daughter DIDN'T send.

*Exclaim* Technical and Editorial Considerations. In this section I normally list those areas that relate specifically to the mechanics of your writing--punctuation, grammar, spelling, etc.

         *Bullet* I mentioned a formatting issue (grammar and punctuation) above. Otherwise, I found no spelling issues.   

*Star* My Rating.  4.0.  An above average piece that needs a better format to really be great.

*Heart* Thank you for sharing this offering. Please accept these comments as offered in friendship and support. They are but my humble opinion.


Reviewed by
JACE

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