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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4740103
Review #4740103
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Rated: | (4.0)
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Greetings, icracra.

I'm Jace, and I have the honor of reading and reviewing your offering "Invalid Item for the "~ The Poet's Place Cafe~ group. *Smile*

*Puzzle4*
Form. Your offering is a short free form verse. While short, though, it tells a complete story.

*Note1*
Overall Impression. I think you title gives away too much. I suggest you shorten it to One Word. As is, a reader doesn't have to even read your poem. Leave the punchline (for lack of a better word) IN your poem.

*Exclaim*
Technical or Editorial Considerations. I invite your attention to the comments below. Please bear in mind these notes are from one on the outside looking in; ultimately only you can decide what's right for your poem.

         *Bullet* The only change I'd suggest to your poem body is move the word God to its own line ending your poem. It will make a stronger statement in my opinion.
 
 

*Heart*
My Rating: 4.0. Thank you for sharing this offering. Please accept these comments as offered in friendship and support. They are but my humble opinions.


Reviewed by
JACE

Sig for Poetic Exploration


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.






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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 03/29/2024 @ 11:47am EDT
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4740103