*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742434
Review #4742434
Viewing a review of:
 
Touch  [18+]
Do we dare? Writer's Cramp entry - 25 lines
by IE
Review of Touch  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
House Florent Image for G.o.T.
 
GROUP
The Iron Bank of Braavos  (13+)
For G.o.T. Activity
#1994693 by Gaby ~ Quiet contemplation
"Game of Thrones Hello fellow writer. My name is Sandra. I am one of the sly foxes.
Title: Touch
First Impression: This is an entry for The Writer's Cramp, so I do appreciate it was created following a strict time constraint. OOO, a steamy bit of writing here, very suggestive. You hint at an online meeting and conversation before an actual hook-up. I admire how you wove the prompt words into this poem. You tease with the less-is-more philosophy. You only refer to 'touch'. You never elaborate and this creates mystery, allure. I appreciate your use of 'blossoms' to be something other than related to flowers.
What needs your attention: Nothing. Although short and succinct this poem is like the clandestine meetings in the car, brief and intense. You need only hint at actions, reactions and the reader can fill in the rest with innuendo and/or imagination. These two were not together to play a board game.
What part I liked best: I mentioned the fast-moving urgency this evokes did I not? It is hot and intense as I commented. A secret tryst is constrained by lack of time and opportunities and locations to be together. The pace reflects this. Your poem reads as both a remembrance and a yearning for another encounter. Communication manifests in many forms, doesn't it? You subtly write about the different senses with mention of the summer heat, the anticipated touching, hearing a lover's voice, sighting a particular hairstyle.
Overall Impression: I love this vivid piece of writing. You packed a punch with your carefully crafted portrayal of intimacy. Kudos. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure. What does the fox say???Listen carefully. (1777 characters) DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/06/2024 @ 8:24pm EDT
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742434