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Review #4745083
Viewing a review of:
 Where's My Sword  [E]
A girl wants a sword... 2nd Place in the Bedtime and fairytale contest.
by Dawn Embers
Review of Where's My Sword  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello Dawn Embers! This review is given on behalf of "Game of Thrones" .

*Reading* This is a good children's story. I could envision it with illustrations on each page. It's a good job showing that it's okay if you don't feel like you belong. There's always someone who understands and will be there for you.

The Title and Description - A good title that fits the story perfectly. Congratulations on winning second place in the Bedtime and Fairytale Contest. That's a great idea for a contest! I like the short description you have so far, but maybe you can move the 2nd place notification to the bottom of your piece, and expand on the description. I think it would help bring more people in to read your story.

The Storyline/Plot - A little girl is looking forward to her tenth birthday when she will receive a wooden sword. After all, that was the traditional ten-year-old gift in their family. But when her tenth birthday arrived, the long box was not a sword. After all, she was a girl. The gift she received in its place was horrible. Bless her heart. As a tomgirl growing up, I could definitely feel her pain. The little boy, the youngest of the boys in the family, didn't want a sword. He wanted to stay inside, he didn't like to work outside.

The Characters - You did a great job writing the characters. I easily got a sense of who they were and what made them happy and sad. Nice job!

What I Liked The Best - The part where the brother gave her a gift to make her smile again. The bond the two shared.

Thank you so much for sharing your piece with us. I enjoyed it.

*Heart* Tracey

"When you play the Game of Thrones you win, or you die." Cersei Lannister
House Lannister image for G.o.T.



The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/15/2024 @ 1:37pm EDT
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