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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4745504
Review #4745504
Viewing a review of:
Cabin Fever  [GC]
Writings from 11/02 to 3/05.
by Fivesixer
         Review for entry/chapter: "Lost" 
Review of Cabin Fever  
Review by Jayne
Rated: GC | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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This is a "Game of Thrones"  review!


Hello, Fivesixer!

*Checkb*Overall Impression:
Blame Gaby for the throwback train I made you board. A classic you posted for us in 2008 (don't call it comeback), this poem is a hauntingly brief piece that captures a sense of deep resignation and existential drift. The poem’s somber tone and minimalist style effectively convey the theme of isolation and disconnection from the past and present.

*Checkb*Form, Rhythm, Cadence, and Style:
The structure is sparse, which complements the theme of emptiness and loss. The rhythm is subdued and reflective, with each line contributing to the overarching feeling of being adrift and disconnected from one's surroundings and past.

*Checkb*Content:
The poem explores themes of regret, loss, and the unyielding passage of time. It poignantly touches on the idea of always being "a day behind," unable to catch up or use guidance. The imagery of drinking alone during a snowstorm sums up the poem's melancholic core.

*Checkb*Grammar and Mechanics:
The poem's grammar and mechanics suit its straightforward and stark style. However, a gentle suggestion might be to punctuate more consistently to aid in the delivery of key phrases, such as after "Tomorrow's here and I'm a day behind," which would provide a pause that emphasizes the weight of realization. We will never agree on that, so I will keep moving. Don't come at me.

*Checkb*Final Thoughts:
As is so often the case with your poetry, the piece is incredibly powerful. It's expression of enduring solitude and the poignant resignation to one's fate. The poem's starkness is both a stylistic strength and a thematic vehicle, driving home the feelings of isolation and regret.

Thank you for sharing your work with us!

Jayne *Smile*


My approach to reviews: "I'll Explain, but not Disclaim" 


The views and opinions in this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and, therefore, do not necessarily reflect the group, activity, and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/16/2024 @ 11:40am EDT
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