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Review #4745534
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island time  [ASR]
running away to the sun
by Words Whirling 'Round
Review of island time  
Review by Jayne
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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This is a "Game of Thrones review!


Hello, Words Whirling 'Round!

*Checkb*Overall Impression:
You've captured the transformative journey of healing and self-discovery set against a serene, oceanic backdrop.

*Checkb*Form, Rhythm, Cadence, and Style:
The free verse structure, with each stanza representing a different phase in the speaker’s journey, is well-suited to the theme. It mimics the ebb and flow of tides—a metaphor for the fluctuations in the speaker’s emotional state. The rhythm is generally fluid, reflecting the relaxed pace of island life, which is disrupted only by the emotional peaks conveyed through sharper, shorter phrases such as "uncoupling in the dark."

*Checkb*Content:
Each stanza of the poem marks a distinct phase of the speaker's emotional and psychological state during their time on the island. The journey begins with a prescribed escape ("pacific prescription"), evolves into a deeper, reflective healing process ("intertidal therapy"), and transitions into a phase of easing pain ("tequila sunset") before culminating in a sad realization of lingering memories despite the passage of time ("memories remain"). This thematic progression is thoughtfully crafted, allowing the reader to experience the healing process alongside the natural beauty and isolation of the island setting.

*Checkb*Grammar and Mechanics:
The deliberate choices in line breaks work as punctuation and guide the reader through the poem's emotional shifts. I found no problems with spelling or grammar.

*Checkb*Final Thoughts:
This beautifully crafted poem offers a meditative look at healing and the passage of time in a serene, natural setting. The idea of a slow, sometimes painful, journey toward emotional recovery is sure to resonate with readers.

Thank you for sharing your work with us!

Jayne *Smile*


My approach to reviews: "I'll Explain, but not Disclaim


The views and opinions in this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and, therefore, do not necessarily reflect the group, activity, and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer, and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/17/2024 @ 1:22pm EDT
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