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Review #4745777
Viewing a review of:
 The Smiling Rabbit  [13+]
The monsters are coming.
by Abby Gayle
Review by Jeff
In affiliation with The Free Folk  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
The Free Folk image for G.o.T.


Hello Abby Gayle

I'm sending this review in connection with "Game of Thrones.


*Penw* Positives

The story engages with a mystical and foreboding atmosphere from the outset, establishing a sense of urgency and mystery that drives the narrative forward effectively. The setting in the woods introduces a traditional backdrop for fairy tale elements, and the character of Caitlin is well-drawn.

The pacing of the story is another strong point, with the action interwoven with quieter, more reflective moments that add layers of meaning to the story. This pacing helps to build tension and release it in a way that is satisfying and engaging.


*Penw* Suggestions

While the story is strong in atmosphere and intrigue, there are moments where the clarity of the narrative could be enhanced. The transitions between the real and the supernatural could be smoothed out to help the reader maintain a grip on the unfolding events.

The character of Auntie Lydia, while intriguing, feels somewhat underdeveloped to me and her sudden appearance might benefit from a bit more foreshadowing or explanation within the narrative context.

The conclusion of the story also feels slightly rushed. Expanding on Caitlin’s final moments and providing a bit more insight into her thoughts and feelings could give the ending the weight it aims to achieve.


*Penw* Overall

This is a compelling short story that effectively melds elements of fantasy and drama. The narrative is engaging and well-structured, with strong character development and a well-maintained suspenseful atmosphere. Nicely done!


Respectfully,

Jeff
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