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Review #4747456
Viewing a review of:
 Sleepy Hollow  [E]
A Legend of Sleepy Hollow inspired poem I wrote a while back. Touches on a love of scary.
by Detective
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#4747456
Review of Sleepy Hollow  
Review by Jayne
Rated: E | (4.5)
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This is a "Game of Thrones"  review!


Hello, Detective!

*Checkb*Overall Impression:
The poem has a fantastic atmosphere and intertwines the foreboding essence of the original story with a rich, personal narrative tied to the Crane family.

*Checkb*Form, Rhythm, Cadence, and Style:
The use of varied line lengths and the repetitive invocation of natural light sources—lantern, moonlight, starlight—contribute to a lyrical quality that matches the poem’s mystical and ominous themes. The cadence almost moves like horse hooves, which is an interesting touch.

*Checkb*Content:
The poem has plenty of eerie imagery with a sense of foreboding and hope, capturing the essence of both the love for the macabre and the quest for resolution.

You've combined elements of folklore with a personal family saga, creating a layered story that is both specific in its references to the Sleepy Hollow mythology and universal in its exploration of legacy and destiny.

*Checkb*Grammar and Mechanics:
The poem is well-composed with carefully chosen words and uses language and stylistic choices that evoke the desired dark and eerie tone. The archaic terms and structured format effectively pay tribute to the source material’s time period and style.

The one sticky line for me (and I'm nitpicking here, so take it for what it's worth) is And the headless one vanquish. Could it come across as the headless one doing the vanquishing? Maybe? Flipping it around to And vanquish the headless one could theoretically improve the clarity of the line.

Overall, it stylistically captures the atmosphere as intended.

*Checkb*Final Thoughts:
This is a haunting homage to its source material, offering both chills and a reflection on the power of names and legacies.

Thank you for sharing your work with us!

Jayne *Smile*


My approach to reviews: "I'll Explain, but not Disclaim" 


The views and opinions in this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and, therefore, do not necessarily reflect the group, activity, and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/23/2024 @ 9:54pm EDT
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