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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/2518-.html
Comedy: July 23, 2008 Issue [#2518]

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Comedy


 This week:
  Edited by: Kate - Writing & Reading
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

         Greetings, I’m honored to be your guest host for this week’s WDC Comedy Newsletter.

*Star**Smile**Halfstar*


         It takes seven muscles to smile and twenty-seven to frown, and laughter is an aerobic exercise. So think of it, comedy is therapeutic - both for the writer and the reader/listener*Thumbsup*


Word from our sponsor

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Letter from the editor

         I’m not a funny person, I’m told. I often miss a punch line; but I have a knack for making people laugh when I open my mouth, albeit at my expense *Rolleyes* So, I've learned over decades to keep my eyes and ears open and my mouth shut (my pencil ever sharpened).

         As a seasoned eavesdropper, I catch bits and pieces of conversations, verbal and tactile, and weave stories and verse real and imagined, sometimes hilarious. And some of the most comical are those which relate to computers. One doesn't need a lot of technical expertise to operate a computer, they are so 'simple' a kid can compute. Just watch, a child simply pick up a joystick or tap a few keys and navigates through a game without aid of a manual. So why can't adults do likewise? Why do we read the manual, follow the schematic and, when we still can't get past the start-up screen or, worse yet, in a fit of frustrated angst, slam a bunch of keys and evoke the 'blue screen of death,' give up and call 'customer service.' The toll free number, after several mechanical prompts in at least two languages, queues us for a human technician.


"Good evening, I'm Rick, how can I help you?

"I just got a brand new laptop and it doesn't work."

"What’s your operating system?”

“High Speed DSL”

“Your operating system, what do you see on your computer when you start up?”

“A sunflower”

“Okay, to help you, I need you to open ‘my computer.’”

“I don’t care about your computer, I called you to get my computer running right.”

“I’m trying to do that, and I need you to open ‘my computer’ so you can tell me your operating system”

“I told you it’s high-speed DSL, weren’t you listening?”

“Ma’am, I need you to right click on ‘start’ please.”

“I don’t see a start button on the keyboard, or on the screen, I’ve pressed them all and just managed to blur the sunflower on the monitor.”

“Ma’am, please look at the status bar at the bottom of your screen, you’ll see an icon and the word ‘start’

“Under the sunflower?”

“Yes, under the sunflower; do you see it?”

“Yes, I do, what a dumb place for it”

“Now right-click on the word ‘start’.”

*****

         A computer is obsolete from the moment it is manufactured, as faster, smarter computers are constantly being developed. If mortal humanity had a similar parallel, I can only imagine how we would look today ~ hmm, another adventure comedic*Wink*

         Unless you are the real "Rip VanWinkle" awakened after several centuries, you've had some quarrel or other with a keyboard or laptop where you've come up on the short end. Perhaps your favorite 'handle' was co-opted; or the story nearly ready for submission was saved, you're sure, maybe perhaps, but where? Or, you've diligently trouble-shot your missing shortcut via the manual with such lack of success that you begin to question whether you are reading the section in your own language? Or, maybe you've been on the giving end of some advice or counsel and managed with Herculean effort not to either laugh at or strangle the querant who just 'didn't get it.'

         For sanity's sake, find - and, fellow wordsmith, share - the humor of it! And, as an added bonus, know you are contributing ot the health and well-being of your readers - eliciting some aerobic exercise*Wink*

         Thank you for this welcome into your virtual home. Until we next meet, Keep Writing!




Editor's Picks

Check out the following prose and verse ~ 'computer logic' offered for an aerobic laugh or perhaps age-defying wry smile (and review) by members of our Community

 Think Before You Speak  (13+)
An illustration of why it is important to take that thought one step further.
#1445687 by audra_branson


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#1444943 by Not Available.


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#1418090 by Not Available.


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This item number is not valid.
#1414474 by Not Available.


 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#1406800 by Not Available.


 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#1402397 by Not Available.


 A hungry girl is an angry girl!  (13+)
Linux is driving me up the wall!
#1355846 by Klaassen


 Blue Screen of Death  (ASR)
A little ditty about "Mac and Cyan" . . . my eulogy to a fallen computer (WC entry)
#1289389 by phyduex



How about a challenge that may compute for the Muse Comedic?

Make Me Laugh HOLIDAY Shorts Contest  (18+)
Mother's Day round now open for entries!
#1332751 by Shannon


 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#1068576 by Not Available.



While you're at it, check out this Lounge where you can put up your feet and write, and read, and share a laugh or two*Smile*

 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#1276780 by Not Available.

 
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Ask & Answer

Since I'm a guest, I don't have prior comments to share, but do have a question.

Tell me, what's the most comedic computer-related question you've ever heard - or queried - you don't have to admit it's your own question*Wink* Write to this newsletter and it will be seen; or email me. Who knows, there might be some gps in it for you*Wink*


Keep Writing!
Kate
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