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What You Can't See, Can't Hurt You, Right?
Building Fear
You must build FEAR way before you ever show your monster. In fact, the longer you can hold off, the better the Fear has a chance to germinate inside your reader's mind. That's why I believe ghosts are so scary . . . because you can't see them! Well, at least not until it's too late.
The mind is a scary place, and it can generate such large amounts of Fear that it can actually kill you--burst your heart.
Frightening, isn't it?
Take Jeff Johnson, a sewer worker in storm-drain Thirteen checking on a clogged drainage pipe. He's bracketed by work lights that he and Josh Corin have brought down from the truck, and the lights are focused on the spill pipe above his head; otherwise, the tunnel is filled with cool, stagnant darkness.
Although the storm drains aren't connected to the sewer system, and although the concrete conduits are relatively wet after weeks of precipatation, Jeff occasionally gets a whiff of a dark, rotten odor that, depending on its intensity, sometimes makes him grimace and sometimes makes him gag. He wishes that Josh would hurry back with the extension rod he needs to clear the blocked drain.
He feels uneasy, and that makes him learn past the work lights in order to see beyond the glare and into the unilluminated length of the tunnel.
A flashlight bobbles in the darkness, coming this way. It's Josh, at last.
But why is he running?
Josh Corin comes out of the gloom, breathing fast. His eyes are wild, and he is trembling.
"What's wrong?" Jeff asks.
"Back there," Josh says shakily. "In the branch tunnel. Just this side of the manhole."
"Something there? What?"
Josh glances back. "I don't know! My God. I was so afraid. I think it's following me."
Jeff frowns. "What are you talking about?"
Josh starts to speak, hesitates, shakes his head. Looking sheepish, yet still frightened, he says, "You wouldn't believe it. Not in a million years. I don't believe it, and I'm the one who saw it!"
Impatient, Jeff unclips his own flashlight from the tool belt around his waist. He starts back toward the branch drain.
"Wait!" Josh yells. "It might be . . . dangerous to go back there."
"Why?" Jeff demands, exasperated with him.
"Eyes." Josh shivers. "That's what I saw first. Eyes shining in the dark, there inside the mouth of the branch line."
"Is that all? Listen, you saw some rats. Nothing to worry about. When you've been on this job a while, you'll get used to them."
"Not rats," Josh says adamantly. "Rats have red eyes, don't they? These were yellow-white. Kind of silvery. Very bright. It wasn't that they reflected my flashlight. No. I didn't even have the flash on them, and they were right there, no more than six feet from me, the most incredible damned things. Right there!"
Jeff feels a quiver of fear pass through him, but still turns, and heads back down the tunnel. It's the last thing he will ever do.
Scary, huh?
But it builds Fear. It sets the stage without having to show the monster. It gets your reader into a state of panic. They are dying to know what's down there, but they are too scared to look. You gotta hold their hand and walk with them to show them that everything is all right.
But it isn't, and by the time you figure it out, it's too late.
How about this . . . .
A young girl is taking a short walk through the forest when she is suddenly gripped by fear. She turns and heads back toward her car certain that something is rushing at her from behind.
She moves faster. Fear swells with every step.
She spins around with a cry of terror to confront whatever is in pursuit of her.
But she is, of course, alone.
Then the fear again, worse than ever, the absolute dead certainty that it is coming--that it is gaining on her, that it will drag her down, that it is bent on committing an act infinitely worse than murder, that it has an inhuman purpose and unknown uses for her so strange they are beyond her conception. She is in the grip of terror so black and profound, so mindless, that she cannot summon the courage to turn and confront it.
She runs and staggers and flails uphill, making wordless sounds of blind panic, "Uh, uh, uhhhh, uh, uh..." all intellect repressed by instinct. Until she makes it to her car, then turns, at last, to scream, "My God, no!" at the nothing that is behind her.
It is the Fear itself that makes us do what 'common sense' would normally tell us is totally stupid. But we still do it: we pull our covers over our head for protection, we leave a little bedside lamp on (as if that's really gonna stop anything). Why? Because we don't want to see what's creeping around our rooms in the wee late hours of the night. We don't want to see the monster.
So don't show him. Don't show your monster until you absolutely have to. You can hint at it, and give brief descriptions without giving it away, but it's truly what we can't see that scares us. And the longer you can pull that off, the scarier your story will become.
Until next time,
billwilcox
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FEAR FACTOR
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Dead Letters From Santa
I had quite an interesting response over my Christmas Newsletter. I have listed them all below, good & bad, because that's what Santa would do, isn't it?
esprit 
Comment:
What an interesting bit of history, Bill. I've read most of this years ago, but you've some new stuff in here. A lot of research time went into this letter. In history, facts are facts and can't be denied--until they are 'discovered' to be fiction. Depends on the winners, doesn't it. The last para is the history I believe, and it can't be changed.
 Good work! I really enjoyed this letter.
 Thanks Esprit, I agree, 'facts are facts' even to those who refuse to accept it...and then the name calling begins 
dmack
Comment:
Great newsletter, W.D., Though I'm afraid you may end up with a large chunk of coal this year.
Have a Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year!
rachie
Comment:
Mr. Wilcox
How brilliant!!! I will read it at least 4 more times before I absorb it all. In the mean time, Merry Thor and Happy Nick.
StephBee - House Targaryen 
Comment:
Only you could be the 'horror' in Santa Claus, Bill. *wink* Great newsletter about the roots of Santa. Thanks for sharing.
SHERRI GIBSON 
Comment:
Great newsletter, Bill! It's frightening to think that Santa is considered to be Satan by some. Like so many others, I was brought up thinking of him as good, however, your newsletter gives me something to think about, not to mention a good idea for a horror story. Thank you for including my story in your newletter, Bill!
gemininski
Comment:
Hey there - brilliant newsletter here! But I noticed one thing. You liken Santa and Thor to each other, and one of the statements that you make is: His element was the fire and his color red. About Thor, enlikening him to Santa.
Thing is, I was sure that Santa originally did not dress in red until the Coca Cola advertisements starred him in their advertisements. I was just wondering if anyone could shed some light onto this? Has Santa always worn red???
okghost
Comment:
A very interesting newsletter. I enjoyed reading it.
Arwen9
Comment:
Awesome!
Thanks for putting my story in the newsletter. AND, for the interesting information about Santa Claus the Evil. lol
I've heard some of that, but not the part about Thor. Very intriguing.
lkokko
Comment:
WOW!
What an eye-opener. You must have done a ton of research. I found the beginning very interesting indeed. The wheels started spinning in my mind of possible stories of the darker kind.
LJPC - the tortoise
Comment:
Hi Bill!
Wow! This was like a doctoral dissertation on the origination of Santa Claus! It was a very impressive and detailed essay, but I did require an extra cup of coffee so as not to nod off in the middle.
I always liked Thor. It's nice to know that he was problably the basis for Santa. I love that Norse stuff - I once had a big old Buick that I named Valkyrie! (I miss that car...)
Thanks very much for including my story.
-Laura
Zoe Graves
Comment:
So, well met Saturnalia from your friendly neighborhood Pagan. :D
Adriana Noir
Comment:
Wow, Bill!
What an impressive and informative newsletter! I never put much thought into Santa and his origins, but have felt for a long time that Christmas has become way too commercialized. Sad that the true meaning has become swept under the rug and lost beneath a swarm of political correctness.
Thanks Adrianna, all too true. It's funny how we must be sensitive to the few people who do not celebrate Christmas, when the fact is they are but a very small percentage of the population in America.
You know, I can get along with just about everybody. I'm an easy going kind of guy. But it is obvious that there were many of you out there who did not like my Santa/Satan Newsletter last month. That's okay. That's fine. And in the spirit of 'equal time' and being 'fair and balanced', I will post your HATE mail. Because I can think of no other name for it than that, and because it's my newsletter that you're commenting about, and I get the last word. If you are a Christian, as I am, you may not want to read this.
So here goes...
Crys-not really here 
Comment:
I find it a total abuse of your power as a mod to write a newsletter that spreads religious beliefs of any sort without regard to the Writing.com community and a newsletter's purpose to inform and enlighten the community's members. Your timing right before Christmas could not be a more terrible time to make such claims as a connection between Santa and Satan, and your preaching tone in the last line was uncalled for. Next time, stick to journalistic standards and keep your opinions, religious or otherwise, out of your newsletter!
 Yes Miranda, I can see that wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and reminding them that it truly signifys the birth of Christ and not some commercial Santa Claus is going way beyond the pale.
For that, you get a lump of coal.
Camberly
Comment:
If you wish to preach, please use the Spirituality newsletter, not Horror. Santa's origin being from a BENEVOLENT Norse God and Catholic St. (of which you DID give the links) does not equal Satan. Yes, his origins may be Pagan, but so is Christmas. Santa is today a symbol of the giving nature of Christmas, just as Christmas itself is only a symbol of the birth of Christ, as he was probably born in spring.
Thanks for straightening me out on that, Camberly, and if I ever do go into preaching I'll be sure to skip your house. Just like Santa did, right?
Here's...your lump of coal.
Free Spirit
Comment:
Hi, I don't want to sound criticising but most people already realise the legend of Santa is false, but its a lovely idea and its nice to pretend. I couldn't finish reading reading the letter from the editor because I thought it would totally destroy my vision of St Nick etc. What better fairy tale for a child than that there is somebody who can make one day special for everyone? Yes, you may well say that person should be God or Jesus but children need something tangible to believe in. I think the whole thing has been too deeply looked into and I'm sorry but I think its overopinionated and trying to tell people what to think. Sorry.
Okay, I Love My Horse, we'll all just skip around in fantasyland and teach our children to believe in something (tangible?) like, uh, I don't know, a man in a red suit that breaks into your place rather than a religious upbringing that can give your kids solid morals and laws to live and guide them by.
Sorry, you get a lump of coal.
Little Raven
Comment:
WOW!
I never thought that I would get a Christian story bashing every faith and tradition that came before it here, of all places. You forgot to mention the Celtic history surrounding Cernunnos (Holly King/Oak King) and the Yule festivites. Not to mention the countless Wiccans that practice this faith today or the fact that it predates the birth of your "savior".
Anyway, I don't think that comparing Santa to Satan and literaly preaching the Christian faith is the idea behind this newsletter. I'm unsubcribing.
Thanks!
Aww, Little Raven, sorry to see ya go, but I'm an American, and this country was founded on the Christian religion and the majority of people who live here are Christians. Now, I understand that bashing Christianity is the 'IN' thing to do, and that we're not supposed to say Merry Christmas anymore because it's not polictically correct, but you know what, that's all a big bunch of hooey. Merry Christmas!
And here's your lump of coal.
JubeCube ~ official homeowner!
Comment:
I find your newsletter in very poor taste this week. Everyone knows that 'Jesus' was actually born mid year and has absolutely nothing to do with Christmas. It was the Christian’s way of trying to convert the pagans from Yule to their ways. Very sad to see you are forcing your opinion on the rest of us.
Sorry Jube, but I wasn't forcing anything. I simply stated, Merry Christmas, and mentioned Christ at Christmas time. If that has offended you...
Here's your lump of coal!
opto
Comment:
I am very disappointed with this newsletter and can't believe that it was published. Why do you feel the need to bash other religions in order to elevate your own?
For the record, some of us do not worship a man on a stick that was born in the spring at Christmas time. For the vast majority of us, we celebrate family. Santa (who is NOT Satan which was an icon created by the Bible) is a symbol of hope and joy to a people who need hope and joy.
I honestly cannot believe you wrote this. I am saddened and amazed.
Not as amazed as I am, Frankie. I really had no idea that this newsletter was going to cause such a divison between Christians and pagans. I'm also amazed that you feel Santa is a symbol of hope and joy for your family and Christ is just a man who died on a stick and should not be worshipped and should never be mentioned in this or any other newsletter. Sorry, but it's Christmas time, and that's what we do. And we've been doing it for ever so long and will not stop just because it offends some people. I had no intention of offending anyone. But there are people you just can't argue with because it's a waste of time.
So...here's your lump of coal!!!
Isobael 
Comment:
I sincerely hope this newsletter issue was a joke. A very poorly executed joke, but a joke, because the content of this newsletter was horrible. How dare you push you religion on me.
Actually, Christians stole Christmas from other religions so you may want to get your facts straight.
Ugh, I need to gouge my eyeballs out with rusty spoons after reading this tripe.
Wow, *shakes head* That's really amazing. I saved your comments for last, Isobael, I hope you approve.
This tripe, as you so eloquently stated, has been around for a very long time and I'm sure you know that. Christianity is what the founding fathers of this country used when drafting our constitution and declaration of independence. It was considered to be used more as 'guidelines' of what was the 'right' and 'wrong' way to run a country. Now, I have to admit, there ain't no talking trees or 21 virgins waiting for Christians in heaven, BUT we got us a country, and on December 25th we say Merry Christmas to one another and Thank God for our freedom while you run around gouging your eyeballs out with a rusty spoon. Man, that has GOT to be painful.
Anyway, here's a shovel full of coal for you....Merry Christmas!
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Horror/Scary: January 13, 2010 Issue [#3495]
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