  Spiritual
This week: Vampires among Us Edited by: KimChi  
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We have enough problems inside our own heads without worrying about others slowly stealing our well-being. Watch out for the soul-suckers and stay far away.
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Far from being mythological creatures, vampires stroll the city streets and haunt people over phone lines and internet connections. They don't want your blood, just your energy. Since losing either blood or energy causes exhaustion, the term "vampire" is an apt description.
They are called energy vampires or psychological vampires. We all know one. The relative who calls ten times a day to ask a favor when you're up to your elbows in dish water. The neighbor who drops by at odd hours to complain about his life. The "friend" who can't wash her hair without asking your opinion.
You want to be a kind person, someone who helps others. Sometimes the best thing to do is to let them help themselves.
Not all those who take energy are vampires. Babies will suck every ounce of energy from a mother's frame, and the mother willingly gives her time and attention so her children thrive. Gradually, the children learn independence and roam farther from Momma's pants leg. This is the way of both nature and nurture.
Then there are those who truly have special needs. The elderly and the handicapped are incapable of the same quality of life a healthy person enjoys without assistance. There is honor in lending a hand to the less fortunate.
To a point.
To illustrate the limits of goodwill to men, let's meet Fiona Fearful.
Fiona suffered a stroke and as a result, her mental state has changed. She's still the same take-charge, Type A personality who gets things done right the first time, but she's understandably frustrated at the crippling blow life has struck her. Residing inside her personality with the general "witchiness" and bossiness she's always had is a new trait--fear. Fear of falling, fear of muggings, fear of driving, fear of walking.
Everyone is happy to help Fiona when she needs it. The trouble is that she can no longer separate "need" from "want".
Finding a ride to the doctor's office is a "need". Making it to a "one-day-only" clearance sale is a want. Requesting someone drive out of their way in rush hour to deliver a single item is an intrusion into their precious time. But that doesn't stop her from expecting others to drop what they're doing and rush to her aid.
Fiona has no idea she's an energy vampire. All she knows is that life is unfair. And in her mind, that means the rest of the world owes her something. We do--we owe her the same respect everyone else gets, and an understanding of her physical limitations. We do not owe her, or anyone else, an unlimited ear or unlimited access to our energy.
Fiona isn't even the worst kind of vamp because she's ill, while most energy-suckers are perfectly healthy specimens of humanity. Debbie Downer and Wendy Whiner have normal lives, but they obviously have "issues", whether a mental disease, an unhappy childhood, depression, etc. And most don't realize how they drain other people with each interaction. (Compared to "psychic vampires" who deliberately steal energy. Do they really exist? You tell me.)
The victims of an energy vamp eventually realize that they feel tired, confused, or cranky when they're around the vamp. If being with a person makes you feel listless, or guilty, or depressed, and every meeting makes you reach for the aspirin bottle, it's best to limit time in their presence. If they ask a favor that would greatly inconvenience you, just say no. Feeding them only makes them more hungry. If a vamp can't steal your energy, they'll find a new victim. And if everyone around them puts up a shield of tough love, maybe, just maybe, they'll grow up and learn to walk without holding onto a pants leg.
Hope springs eternal, but hey--an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of Excedrin.
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Editor's Picks
Enjoy these stories of "traditional" vampires and energy vampires.
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Excuse me? You say "How can there be more than one type of Vampire?" Well, look at it in this manner. The traditional Vampire - the one with whom we're all familiar - robs us of our life-sustaining blood. Why shouldn't we call people who steal other things from us, other than blood, Vampires?
On a night filled with foundation-rattling thunder, I lay in a musty, mouse-infested room above an ancient tavern and struggled to remain conscious.
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Suddenly, I began to feel dizzy and leaned forward. I wasn't sure what was happening, but I needed to steady myself.
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Take a poll and make your opinion count. The stats did not surprise me.
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Somewhere toward the back of your home I hear you exit through a door I have never seen.
I'm here. Not like you couldn't have smelled me.
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I was born this way, not brought back from the grave. I don't sleep in a coffin containing soil from my homeland -- Pittsburgh. I sleep on a king-size Dream Master mattress with firm support, because it is what Brenda, my spouse, insists upon.
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Question
Have you known an energy vamp or even a psychic vampire? How do you protect yourself?
Comments
shepherd46 says:
Wonderful article on joy! I find joy in a sunset or sunrise, writing a good article, making a good meal for my husband and helping others when I can.
creatress replies:
Thank you. I really needed to be reminded of this.
myzeb  writes:
Kimchi, thank you for taking me out of my own world of "I'm too busy." To sit and relax and enjoy some reading of the newsletter. What I find joy in is just sitting on the sofa and watching my daughter on her PC chatting with her friends. And my husband watching TV. My joy is my family. Yes, we aren't interacting but we have a roof over our heads, we are together, and we are breathing. I thank God everyday we can get up every morning, it's a miracle.
BIG BAD WOLF is hopping  sends a link with his comment:
Sometimes a laugh is needed.
M.Harris claims: "Reach for Joy" brighened my day. How wonderful to know that a spiritual newsletter is available to me. Signed: Newbie M.Harris
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Spiritual: September 07, 2011 Issue [#4606]
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