  Spiritual
This week: Spiritual Experiences Edited by: Kit  
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When I'm asked to prove that God exists, I'll have to politely decline. I can't drag Him down from Heaven and show Him off. I can't ask Him to perform miracles. All I have are my own experiences, and how they have impacted my life...
This week's Spiritual Newsletter is all about faith.
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When you're a person of faith, you are bound to get questioned about it sooner or later. Those who don't believe tend to ask why others do. "How do you know God exists?" "Do you have proof?" The answer is, of course, that I don't have proof that God exists. I've never held the Bible out as evidence, because if people don't share my faith, they're unlikely to accept the Bible as anything other than a collection of historical documents. I can't point to the world around me, either, because other people see it as the beauty of evolution, whilst I see it as a combination of evolution and intelligent design.
God doesn't talk with me. God doesn't show Himself to me. Not in any concrete ways. My faith, as readers of this newsletter will probably know, is different from that of many others. I constantly question what I believe. I don't follow the Bible in any other way than to have taken to heart to treat others with kindness, and to believe in the importance of love. And I believe in the sacrifice of Jesus, which makes me a Christian. Other than that, I feel there's a lot that's open to interpretation, and I also think a lot of what was written makes sense in the context of the time it was written in (political, societal and related to the advancements of that era), so it doesn't necessarily follow that it would be suitable for the day and age we're in now. For example, technology means that certain types of food that would easily spoil back then, can be safely stored now, at least wherever people have fridges and freezers.
I don't believe in a hell as a place of eternal suffering. I don't believe that a loving God would have allowed such a thing to exist. I reckon that when we die, we're either allowed to be with God (Heaven), or we remain in nothingness. I don't even really believe in a devil - I think that the battle between good and bad is in all of us. And that without bad, we can't truly appreciate the good.
I'm pro-marriage for people who happen to love someone of the same gender, because love is love and everyone should have the same rights. And I see men and women as equal, and strongly feel that a woman's body is her own. That's my faith. That's what I believe in. Some of it opens me up to questions from both atheists and Christians, and that's okay. I don't have proof of any of it, but I will share some of my experiences that have strengthened my faith.
The most significant experience happened in 2001. I was dying. Someone had gone to great effort to make sure I was dying. I was very scared at first, and I prayed with all my might. Soon afterwards, I felt a great sense of peace. I felt that someone was with me, holding me, keeping me safe. I knew that everything would be alright.
I'd been left for dead, but I was rescued. In the hospital, the doctors were quite surprised that I made it through. Though the road to recovery was slow, and some damage is lasting, I'm still around to tell the tale, and I am grateful for that.
Some might say that the mind can play tricks during moments of great stress. They'd say I was hallucinating. I can't even begin to describe what I saw and felt, and perhaps that confirms their point of view, but to me God was there for me and looked after me. Why? I don't know. I don't know why I was spared, or what purpose my extra time on this planet has, but there has to have been a reason. Maybe I will find it one day.
I've had similar experiences during the most difficult times of my life, when all hope seemed lost. One time, when I still went to a church, someone prayed for me and said that they strongly felt they should tell me to not be afraid. Whether that was true or not, it's stuck with me, and I've always ended up alright. Sometimes the changes in my life, at those points of conflict, have been drastic. One time I ended up in London. Another time in Wales. And yet another time I ended up in the north of England, where I still live to this day. It seems that even though I was born and raised in the Netherlands, I was meant to be in the UK.
I've often felt that someone, somewhere, is looking out for me, and that the rollercoaster ride that's been my life has taught me a lot of valuable lessons. Some of those lessons have been harsh, but I'd like to think that they've made me a better person than I used to be.
My life has been very different than that of my family members. Not better, just different. I don't think that would have happened without a reason. I am not the only person in my family with an encounter like I described above, though...
My grandfather was once on a path to self-destruction. One day he walked into the cellar of his house to grab something, and his eye fell on a poster at the back of the cellar door. It carried the familiar quote of today being the first day of the rest of your life. That poster had been there ever since he moved into the home, and he must have seen it plenty of times, but that day it struck him, and his situation struck him, and he cried out that nobody was helping him. He's told me that at that moment he heard a voice in his head, so loud that it was overpowering. It questioned him about why he wasn't helping himself.
My grandfather moved upstairs, and sat down, and grabbed the Bible. It fell open on a quote that's been important to him for the rest of his life: ""A bruised reed He will not break
And a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish" (Isaiah 42:3)
That day, he determined to get back on the right path, and soon afterwards he was asked to take over the "Nationaal Kruisleger", an organization not dissimilar to the Salvation Army. His wife soon turned to the Lord as well. That was 35 years ago, and they're still going strong.
Again, it could have been coincidence. It could have been psychological. Or it could have been something else. Whatever it was, it worked.
That, I guess, is what faith is all about. There is no proof. We can't drag God out of Heaven and show Him off like we do our latest mobile phones or laptops, but the experiences we have are meaningful nonetheless.
This week I would like to ask you to share your experiences with me. If you have an item in your port that describes them, or feel like creating a new one, or simply want to share it in a response to this newsletter, please feel free! They might just be linked in my next edition  . If there is anything that really touches me, I might even award it.
And please don't let the fact that I am a Christian put you off if you're from a different faith or spiritual path. You're welcome here. This is your place, too. I'd like to read about your experiences.
kittiara
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Here are some of the latest additions to the Spiritual genre. I hope that you will enjoy them .
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The Spiritual Newsletter Team welcomes any and all questions, suggestions, thoughts and feedback, so please don't hesitate to write in!
Scarlett  - A little late in responding, but wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed reading this Newsletter. A subject very close to my heart. Thanks for writing so eloquently.
Thank you so very much! I am glad you enjoyed it .
~~~
Iva Lilly Durham  - When my beloved mother died in my arms, I saw and felt the spirit leave her suddenly and knew whatever made her human had gone, slipped away. I believe that was her soul, her breath of life from our God. It gave me peace of mind knowing her soul lived in another place.
I have enjoyed your contributions to this newsletter which never fail to read. - Iva
Iva - first of all, I am sorry to read about your loss. I am glad that you had that comfort, that knowledge that your mother lives on in another place. I can't imagine what such an experience was like! Thank you for sharing.
~~~
shoumojit - Hi
Kittiara
This topic nature of the soul is informative and explanatory as well and you are correct in identifying that there is a inner "me"..that witnesses everything..most of the things we as conscious self is not aware..its just the things that our five senses with active participation of the mind perceive we remember and the rest we tend to forget and you did try to give the position of soul in the head..here as per traditional Indian research the soul has been located near the heart..and we come to know about its existence when we do meditation on our heart and with inner advancement we identify it, however a true seeker goes deeper and finds everything around us is a illusion and perseveres till he reaches the self realization wherein he finds he and the universe is one and that is called knowledge of oneness and oneness of knowledge..Rajasri
Hi Rajasri! Thanks so much for writing in. That sounds really interesting, and something I would definitely like to know more about! I will have to do some research, thanks!
~~~
ANN Counselor, Lesbian & Happy  - ow sweet of you to include my recent story "from bombs to hate to perfect love", fiction but with a soul, spirit component. It came to me as I was trying to sleep, but my mind wouldn't settle down as a new story idea flowed through. It demanded to be written then...I was even afraid it would be gone when morning came. So, I turned the light on and began to write, finishing at daybreak. Some stories just demand to be written; that was one of them. I wonder why? I thank you very much. Ann
Hi Ann! I know the feeling of when something just demands to be written. I've had that happen as well, and I never know why it happens, but I am glad that it does. And your story is a beautiful one, full of meaning and deeply touching. I think it had a message that had to be shared with the world...
~~~
ANN Counselor, Lesbian & Happy - Kittiara: This was a wonderful newsletter, your words about the soul was so informative, provacative, insightful, and kind. Though there is no clear answer, you reminded all of us that there is definitely something important about our soul and we need to take care of it. Well done. Thank you.
And thank you so much for your kind words!
~~~
johnny1209 - Regarding the soul,
Man as Nephesh
The LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground,
and breathed into his nostrils the breath [ruach] of life,
and the man became a living being/soul [nephesh]
-Genesis 2:7
Much of the Christian world teaches that the soul is immortal because we are immortal since Christ was resurrected. The Hebrews of the OT did not believe the soul was immortal, believing it died when the body went to the grave.
Whatever, the soul, whatever it is, was created when the breath of God was blown into the human body.
John W. McCormick III
Thank you, John! It's amazing, isn't it? The immortal soul...
~~~
embe - To Kittiara,
To wake in dreams music to my soul
with such a pleasure to spend a time,
within theater of rhythm and rhyme
the Maestro scribbling on his script,
carried away by the words of wonder
longing sorrows do his words portend,
verse brings joy and wonder in the end
the Conductor bowing waves his baton.
Turning to the ovation he deftly bends
O for a song to sing lyrics to the moon,
to hide from souls sorrows crying away
shame of thoughts this fear to be lost,
with dreary songs playing in my mind
scared to dream but scored in thought,
music abandoned despair in solitude
fast fading away into silence of dying.
Having played new music for my soul
my baton directing in this orchestra,
melodies joyous the opera waiting
for tenors singing wondrous words,
measured alive their spirit of song
binding together invisible threads,
the human minds relating to time
my music if you are deaf like me.
Thank you so much for sharing your eloquent words, Embe .
~~~
Wishing you a week filled with inspiration,
the Spiritual Newsletter Team
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Spiritual: May 23, 2012 Issue [#5063]
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