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the laying stone of my struggles |
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I was the younger of two sisters in my family, but never did our parents ever made us feel deprived. We were never stopped from doing anything only because we were girls. Neither did our parents ever made us feel that they had wanted sons, or that they considered us as a burden. They were proud to be parents of two daughters, and today I am proud to be there daughter. My parents were very particular about our education and I can thank them today for that. They were particular that we stand on our own feet and become independent, before they married us off. My father made us aware about the need to maintain our self respect and to value out conscience over money. Whatever I am today, and whatever I am doing today is because of them. I thank them whole heartedly because unlike many other parents they did not choose to kill us before or immediately after birth. We got the best of the opportunity in every field of our life. Everything was wonderful, till I got married that is. It was an arranged marriage through newspaper. I do not know why I overlooked so many signs during my courtship period. Signs that my husband was a mama`s boy. Signs that my would be husband is very short tempered, and that my sister in laws are very egoistic, and it is they who rule the house. I guess the last time I was happy was on the day of my marriage. Till date memories of those days make me cry. They were an end to a carefree and somewhat pampered life. It was the beginning of a struggle which would change me from an over protected daughter to a fighter, from a pessimist to a optimist, from someone who always gave up, to someone who learnt to fight the situations. Marriage was a turn in my life, which would expose me to the stark realities of outside life. Reality that despite all advances women in our society have to struggle, struggle to be born, to live, to eat, to study , even to live with self respect. And the struggle is most of the times with those very people who are supposed to ensure all these. Reality that life is very different from what me all are made to believe. That despite all talks about women empowerment, it is a far off dream. Reality that really no one cares or wants to do anything about it. Everyone is happy with things are, are even if they are not happy it is a “chalta hai “approach, which is running this country. Reality that laws are there for the common man, so as to speak, still justice is more often than not out of reach of common women. That the very authorities who are sitting there to enforce the so called “women friendly laws” are not willing to enforce them . In fact it is they themselves who tell the women to forget justice as it is a lot of harassment and to learn to live with abuse. A reality that though laws are there, but the implementing system itself makes it a more of a harassment to fight abuse than to live with it. Reality that most of us have accepted abuse as our way of life, and we do not feel that we can do anything about it. |
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