Not Just Yet

Not Just Yet
It’s 3 am in the morning and I would be sleeping
Except that the Warning maliciously creeping
Has widened the distance that stretches between us
Silently I leave the bed and slip from the room
With a sense of foreboding that deepens to gloom
Worried that nothing can ever redeem us
Drinking yesterday’s coffee I stare at the darkness
The windows are wet and they throw back the likeness
Of someone I thought that I knew all about years ago
But lately, I just can’t tell you, cause I don’t know

Now the sun hurts my eyes; tears relentlessly streaming
You ask me what’s wrong and I lie about dreaming
And I know it’s wrong but it’s easier lying
Somehow you know it and you shake your head, disbelieving
I’m weary of fighting, I make the bed grieving
So guilty cause you’re the one honestly trying
While smoothing the blankets I stare in the mirror
The woman I see there looks so unfamiliar
Like someone I might have met once so long ago
But lately, I just can’t tell you, cause I don’t know

To make you feel better I promise to make a nice dinner
We’ll lock the door, dim the lights and begin there
We could spend hours just talking, and kiss like we used to
We’ll turn off the tube and play our favorite old records
Have a bottle of wine and make a special effort
I’m hoping it works out cause you know I love you
And I can’t stand the emptiness growing between us
It feels like a bitterness eating into my flesh
A blistering sadness that I would do well to forget
But let’s make this evening our newest beginning
Cause I think this battle just might be worth winning
And I’m not ready to quit you, not just yet.