welcome to heartbreak

i cant feel it. it may be numb from the unbearable pain, or it may be numb from the pills. either way, i cant feel it. i wonder if it even there? it used to be. i made my decisions based upon every beat. based upon how it felt. based upon what it knew. i followed it, it was there. it beat fast and strong with you. it was healthy. it was there, one look into your eyes and i could feel it speed up. one touch of our hands made it skip. one kiss of our lips made it yours. i handed it to you. more fragile than glass, i handed it to you hoping you would care for it. hoping you would make it grow, hoping you drop it. you didnt drop it, you threw it. you watched it shatter on the ground into a million pieces. and if breaking it wasnt enough, you called tonight to break the pieces i had so carefully put back togehter in the time since then. its not yet whole, and it wont be for some time. it may not be as strong as when i was with you, but if you listen carefully, you can still hear my heart beating. i just wish it were beating for you.