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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1726765-Piece-of-a-vampire-story
by Dijji
Rated: E · Fiction · Fantasy · #1726765
I need critques for this small piece of writing please!
I trudged through the snow, stopping only to hear for my girl. My girl. I sorted through the thoughts as well as the dreams of the quiet town. But only my own thoughts raced through my head as I tried to concentrate- would she still be here, let alone her family? Would she remember me? Would I recognize her- as well as she me? Light red tears fell in the snow before me, turning it pink. Pink like her cheeks on a cold day? I had to stop this. I found shelter under a bus stop where no snow had fallen and withdrew the paper from my messenger bag. My hands shook as I read the address. 1120…1120 Kingston…Kingston Ave…The tears slid down past my cheek and off my chin as I looked three houses down, across the street, and past a brick mail box. 1120.
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