On a train

John Egbert is on a train. He got on at Rugby, he's going to Watford. See the college there. He's

going to be a mature student. Yeah,  some people see that as a contradiction in terms - ha ha

ha.

         He tries to find a seat in second class but it's bursting. Every seat taken. The spaces

between carriages full of luggage and people - and animals. There's a woman as you enter the

catering carriage holding a lap-dog. Yapping it is. It snaps at John as he eases past.

         'You little ...' John nearly curses. He doesn't cus he realises he's doing it and if he followed

through then in his moral universe, he's bullying the woman. "Live and let ...". The woman gives

John a dirty look. But John doesn't care about that. That's her concern. John sees a girl at the

counter. Dark haired. Lean. Her voice is what some would call 'posh'.

         'No almond shots? I always have an almond shot in my latte. If you don't have almond

shots I think I might have to die.' John feels a trace of bitterness toward the girl. He understands

it's jealousy. She could be from another planet to him. He's been doing twelve hour shifts saving

money try and change his life. John guesses she's got a rich daddy.  There's an older guy,

beard, gut standing beside her. Smiling at the girl. Now he's talking to the woman over the

counter.

         'Honestly - she could die. She's soooo sensitive'. Arty types thinks John. He moves on

through the catering carriage. So, no seats in second class - continue, into first class. John

believes if there aren't any seats in second class - he's paid - he's entitled to a seat - he can use

an empty seat in first class. "It's going to waste"  John doesn't like waste. He figures he gets

asked for a ticket - yeah - he may move. It's not worth a court appearance. That'd be dumb.

         You might actually call it sparse in first class. Here there's people - dotted - around the

carriage. Businessmen, John supposes, from their dress. A blond guy, head-down at his

computer looks up at John as he approaches. Stranger to stranger etiquette. Regard, time to find

the eye. Look away. You'll never see them again. John moves on, into the next carriage, it's less

crowded than the first- only two people. John continues. Empty carriage. John sits, facing the

direction of travel. The green of England moves by. He hauls his bag to the table. Behind him he

can hear voices. Happiness, frivolity in the sound. It's the girl and the older guy from the catering

carriage. There's a pause in their voices when they notice him. The guy's leading the way. He

glances as he passes.

         'They're both great and lousy at the same things'

         'Well I know that' says the girl. She's level with John. She glances and smiles. Yeah thinks

John, the confidence to smile at a stranger; the preserve of youth or money or honesty - or a

mixture of the three.  The guy is taking a seat, other side of the aisle facing John. John notices

now, the bags in the lugggage rack at the top. The girl's sitting down, virtually level with John,

facing the guy, placing her coffee, taking the lid off the cup dipping a finger in the coffee, putting

the finger in her mouth.

         'Both of them' says the guy leaning forward, arms upright on the table, fingers interlaced

'are primarily remembered for the same thing' 

         'Did they meet?' said the girl her hand pushing through her hair. John opens his bag.

Reading material for the train. Brave New World and Nineteen Eighty-Four.

         'I don't actually know. I do know Huxley, in Brave New World Revisited, does talk about

Nineteen Eighty Four'. John paused. He couldn't help hearing what was being said.

         'What does he say' asked the girl. John listened. He was interested.

         'If I told you that, you'd know as much as me'  John turned to the two. He saw the girl was

sticking her tongue out at the guy.

         'Excuse me' said John. The girl and the guy looked over at John,  the guy raised his right

eye-brow.  John held up the two books from his bag.

         'Oh wow' said the girl

         'I think it's what you call - a coincedence' said the guy.

         'Of course' said John, believing he heard a patronising tone. 'Just thought I'd say'. John

turned away. He opened up Brave New World. He read the words "Centrifugal Bumblepuppy". 

Good words he thought to himself. Referencing nothing in his memory. Perhaps now though, he'll

always think of a fat bearded guy trying to put him down. No. Musn't. What a waste of Huxley's

education. John turned the page of the book, coolly -  they were still talking opposite. John didn't

want to hear. He steeled himself to not listening, concentrating on the page.

         'Tickets please'.  No. The word appeared in John's consciousness as he  looked up at a

small-framed man with grey hair. Opposite, they were already passing over their tickets.

Countdown thought John, he's going to turn to me - then there's going to be an issue.And John

wished the girl wasn't so attractive and he wished he hadn't drawn attention to himself. The

official was now turned to John, John gave him his ticket, the man brought it to his clicker to

stamp - then he stopped.

         'This ticket is for standard class' it was said as a challenge.

         'No?' said John. Introducing a touch of outrage and disbelief into his voice. Feeling the eyes

of the girl and the bearded guy turn to him.

         'Yes it is' John interpreted the guard's attitude as "so what are you going to do about it".

         'Can I pay the difference'

         'Yes' said the guard.

         "Shit" thought John. What a waste of money. And all for what: so he wouldn't lose face in

front of the girl. John got his bank card, he passed it to the guard.

         'Pin number please'  and the transaction was complete. John looked out the window. He

heard the girl say:

         'Wasn't he once a professional footballer?' and the guy snootily reply: 

         'I can forgive him for that - he did write 'The Outsider''. John stood up. The girl looked toward

him. The guy looked toward the girl to see what she was looking at. John picked his bag up. He

was moving. He didn't want to hear anymore.