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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1777633-Payroll-Blues
Rated: ASR · Poetry · Experience · #1777633
Talks about my experiences as a Payroll Administrator.


Increase my bond, encash my leave, that’s all I hear each day

Just give this one his number, for him to get his pay!

I need a loan, they need my slips form May until July.

You have to pay my kilometre claim

‘cause my tank has run quite dry!



I have to hear your moans and groans each time before you depart.

I really have to tell you this: ‘your story’s touched my heart!’

So please just stop the yadda, yadda, and let me get on with my job

‘cause if you don’t stop whining soon I might just blow my top!



May I request for both our sakes an e-mail or a call

….you took a wife..and she gave birth….

I don’t have a crystal ball!

They say I have a small amount of psychic ability,

But that’s my own and not for use in this payroll facility.



I sometimes wonder how you cope with your personal affairs,

‘cause when you’re here it really seems as if you have no cares!

You think when you say ‘jump’ I have to ask ‘how high’

I shouldn’t even bat an eye, or else my ass will fry!



You don’t think very high of me in this corporate hierarchy

To you I’m just the ‘go-for-girl’; your personal hand lackey.

I really fail to understand how you can relax,

And expect a novice like me to understand your tax!



You’re the Expert, you’re the Brain; the one with the Degree

And yet how your payslip works, I cannot make you see!

I must admit ‘bout seismic waves I haven’t got a clue

With hydrogen and nitrogen I wouldn’t know what to do!



Leave me in the radio room?

I’d rather let that pass!

But I bet you cannot teach me the first thing,

‘bout how to wipe your ass!



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