Beneath the beat of the waves

Delia was beginning to regret auditioning for the position of lead ballerina in the stage remake of “We all live in a yellow submarine.” She had made her way down to Portsmouth docks and stood beneath the grey steel sky staring at the rusting hulk of a semi-submerged submarine.

“Well, what do you think said, John?”

“It’s not very yellow is it,” said Delia.

“Well nobody is going to see this are they, I mean, do you actually think we’re going to perform in this – there’s hardly enough room for the dance troupe never mind the audience.”

Delia had read the score and she thought there would be plenty of room for the audience - all three of them. “No,” continued John, “I just thought it would be a good idea for you to actually see inside one of these things so that you can get a feeling for it which will come out in your dancing”. Delia, wrinkled her face and tossed the butt of her cigarette into the oily seawater.

“Not very professional is it.”

“what?”

“Smoking I thought you ballet dancers had to be fit.”

“Let’s just get this over and done with, shall we?” said Delia shivering against the cold.



They tottered across a boarding plank and made their way to the conning tower where a bored looking seamen was opening the airlock.

“Aren’t you supposed to whistle us aboard” said John in an attempt at humour.

“Nope” said the dour sailor as he wiped a dew drip off the end of his nose.

“OK, I’ll go first said John’” as he lowered himself into the belly of the sub. Delia followed and instantly regretted her decision to wear a skirt as she descended the ladder,

“Cosy isn’t it?” said John and, the child in him re awakened, started twiddling with the levers and tapping on the dials saying such things as “Nothing on the dial but the makers name, what”  and “Up periscope – I see no ships only hardships”. Delia was just about to give him a piece of her mind when the sub tilted violently to one side.

“What’s happening,” she yelled

“Uh I don’t know,” said John “Maybe I shouldn’t have twiddled with those controls.”

The sub suddenly righted itself amid a noise like a full bath of water being emptied all at once.

“We’re sinking, we’ll drown,” screamed Delia. 

“Don't be daft,” said John “Subs can’t sink it’s what they’re supposed to do,” he said unconvincingly. Nevertheless they felt themselves descending until with a gentle bump they came to rest.

John and Delia both stared at each other until Delia broke the silence and said “Now what?”

“I don’t know,” said John “There must be a radio or something. Maybe we can use that to get help.” They both made their way along the cramped length of the sub and came across a  couple of men seated at a table playing cards.

“Hello,” said John , “I’m John.”

“Hello my names, Paul” said Paul, “And this is George.”

“Hiya,” said George as he pushed a couple of chips into the middle of the table.

“Oh for heavens sake I don’t believe this!” said Delia

“What?” said George.

“You, you’ve got two aces in your hand. You should be going all in!”

“Never mind that,” said John. "We’re sitting on the floor of the ocean and no-one knows we’re here."

“Oh that’ll be Ringo,” said Paul “It’s his idea of a joke he left us down here for two whole days once – he thought it was hilarious. You might as well pull up a chair and join us. It could be a long wait.”

“Well, I don’t want to play this game anymore I’m no good at it’” said George and looked sulkily across at Delia.

“Never mind,” said Delia “I know a really good game it’s called ‘Lucy in the sky with diamonds” I’ll teach you. Get your money out lads” She said  the last with the faintest trace of a smile – maybe the day will be more productive than she originally thought.

***

Delia was standing some way away from the others talking on her mobile under a still cloudy sky. The others were laughing and slapping each others back at another great joke pulled by Ringo who just stood there glumly pulling at his whiskers.

“Well,” said John, as he saw Delia approaching putting the mobile back in her handbag. “Are you up for it then?”

“I don’t think so,” said Delia. “That was my agent and she’s got another gig for me, Swan Lake, I’m meeting her in the park by the pedalloes tomorrow.”