Dream Come Tru?

“I don’t think I can do this.”

Mercedes warily eyed the stables, particularly the large brown quarter horse, calmly eating the grass at her feet.  For as long as she could remember, Mercedes wanted to ride.  When she was a young girl, she used to read novels where the heroine, a cultured young lady, would be an accomplished horsewoman. Usually in these stories, there’s a scene where the woman is saved from a galloping stallion by a strong, handsome man on an even bigger steed.

But the opportunity never presented itself to Mercedes.  She lived in New York City and the only horses seen there are those pulling carriages through the park or those being used in law enforcement.  Of course, there were stables in NYC, but Mercedes never thought it was possible.  When she’d seen one that magnificent animal being ridden by a policeman, she’d look at the two of them with a sense of wonder and envy.  As she passed them, she’d say to herself “I’m going to look up how to ride a horse and I’m going to learn.”  Then, something always came up—being a wife, mother, lawyer—life in general.  Horseback riding took a back seat to carpools, depositions, dinners and diapers.

Now here she was, on her fiftieth birthday, looking at the seemingly gentle, but obviously large piece of horseflesh and the only thing she could feel was terror!

“Mom, you’ve been talking about this from the moment I could understand words.  Lately all you’ve been doing is dreading this birthday and ranting about what you haven’t done.  Well, this is it, the number one item on your bucket list and you’re struck dumb.  The lessons are paid for, and you are going to do this.” Mercedes looked at her daughter Valerie from her peripheral vision.  When she’d gotten in the car, Mercedes thought Val was taking her to a surprise party, to a nail salon, shopping, the zoo!  Any place but here!  Valerie stood there, with her hands on her hips, her eyes steady.  Mercedes knew that look.  She had seen it throughout Val’s life; when she took that position, they were in for a hard time. 

“Val, you know what they say about brittle bones in women over…” Mercedes began.  Valerie put up her hand to silence her.

“Knock it off!  This is happening..get used to it! If dad were alive, you would have been riding by now and on to the next thing on that dreadful “list,” Valerie said softly.  She was good! She used guilt skillfully, like a surgeon, Mercedes thought. 

“Val, let’s be sensible.  Your father, God bless him, begrudgingly let us have the cat, because he heard cats kept mice away.  He wasn’t an animal lover; he would have avoided this like the plague,” She smiled at her, thinking common sense would rule the day.  And it almost worked. Valerie lowered her arms from her hips and Mercedes started planning the spot where she wanted to go for brunch,  But her daughter didn’t move.

“Fine,” she said.  “Daddy would probably not have brought you here today.  But you’ve given up so much for me and for him, This is the one thing you have consistently dreamed about.  You have to do it.  Not for me, not for Daddy.  But for you.  You have to try or you’ll spend the rest of your life with regrets.” When Mercedes said her daughter was good, she wasn’t kidding; Valerie was great.

Mercedes looked at the horse again, and she must felt eyes on her, for she lifted her head and looked at the scared woman, The look in the horse’s eyes was one of understanding, as if she had seen it before.  Mercedes thought, what the heck? You only live once.  She nodded at the horse, who whinnied softly.

Valerie saw that she had won the argument, and called the trainer to the stall.  A burly middle aged man, dressed in jeans and a blue shirt, walked over and shook both women’s hands firmly.  “Name’s Anderson, I’ll be working with you.  Let’s introduce you to your horse. Her name is Moonlight Runner.  Don’t be scared, she’s used to first timers.”  Anderson told her that the she wouldn’t get on the horse right away; that she would learn the horse and the horse would learn her.  He told her it was a matter of trust.  He gave the rope that tethered the horse, told to call the horse’s name and just walk alongside her.  Mercedes said, “Moonlight” and began walking slowly.  The horse followed her and they walked around the field for about twenty minutes.  Mercedes could feel the power in the animal and she felt it transfer to her.  Anderson taught Mercedes how to stop Moonlight Runner by gently saying “Whoa” and the animal obeyed.

“You’re a natural”, Anderson said to Mercedes.  She thought, but did not say, “Of course I’m a natural. I’ve been walking since I was nine months old.” Anderson had Mercedes lead and stop Moonlight Runner a few more times, then they stopped in front of a box that looked like steps.  It was time to get on and ride.  Anderson checked the saddle and reins and motioned to Mercedes.  Mercedes took a deep breath and stepped on the block.  She put her left foot in the stirrup, grabbed the reins and some mane, swung her right leg over and she was in the saddle.  Mercedes saw herself as one of the romantic heroines in her favorite books.  Anderson led Moonlight Runner around the meadow and though she wasn’t galloping, she was riding.  Mercedes felt the years melt away and she was a girl again.

When Anderson told her that the lesson was completed, Mercedes dismounted and rubbed the horse who she now looked on as a friend.  Then Mercedes rubbed her own bottom and thought, “I’m really gonna feel this tomorrow.”  But as she walked toward Valerie, she knew Val was right---she had to try.