Aggression

“Aggression”
July 31, 2008

Shove me back in my shell
Leave me there to die, again.
Alone, with no one to hear me
Again, kicked in the neck because
I can’t make people happy.

People, these things that walk
Upright and claim to have smarts.
Brains so big that they and only they
Can comprehend everything else.
When in reality they can't even
Understand themselves.

People, the upright walking monkeys
That rule this planet
And tell everyone else the rules
If the rules aren’t followed
They kill you.

Or take your sanity,
Your personality,
Your self esteem,
Your images and views,
And tear them from you
Like phone book in half.

No remorse, no regret that
They might have hurt you
Because, you are a singular being.

A being so miniscule and tiny
That they can’t seem to fathom
Your microscopic violin of sorrow.

They can’t seem to hear the tune that
You play, all alone in that dark,
Dank basement where they stuck you.

Away from other people
They did the same thing to.
Stolen from them as well, the emotions.
Of a human being.

This is how we form shells
To keep others out and away
From vital areas so they can’t play with them
Can’t stick needles and pins
And bayonets into the soft flesh
We call caring.

This is where we get cold
Callous and deadened to the love and
Loyalty of others
No one seems to be true to us anymore.
They all want something

Something that we can’t give them
An unfathomable amount of
Stuff. Stuff as in you.
You as in everything you have.

Unending attention,
Respect, and support.
Something to keep them afloat
When the chips are down so low
That even the rats can’t reach
That last of the crumbs.

While all this seems to make them
Much happier and more
Tolerant of you and your cold
Silent disagreements with their life.
When really they want to continue to make
You. Into something that you
Dread being.

But as long as they feel happy
With you being the way they made you
Then they have no problems
But you have just smiled and nodded.
Uninterested in life or anyone else

It’s not how much you care anymore
It’s how much you are yourself.
It’s about kicking in the doors of the
Emotional oppression that you have been
Suffering through for years.

It’s about making a point to stand up and be
What ever you want to be.
Being that one person that should care
The most about you.

You.

Make you feel like you care.
Don’t just stand there and stare
At the world and ask if
They say its okay.

All the world will say is
You… are… fucked… now go sit down.
Go break off a granola and chew on your sofa
Cause you have no say anymore in who you are.

You have to remain
What and who we say
Why? Because your mind and
Heart
And soul belong to the people around you.
Not you.

It belongs to your parents
Your aunts,
Uncles,
Co-workers, and
Bosses… work and school and home
Alike.

The world around you is
Dishonest… and…
…Horrible…

Face it.
Growing up is about giving up,
Tossing yourself to the man,
And falling to your knees to suck
The cock of life until...
It explodes with unhappiness and
Disease all over your face.

Suck it all up…
It won’t get any better for you.
The only way to fix it is to
Take it,
Smile and nod and take it all in stride.

People will walk on you…
Trample your dreams
With enough force to squish
The meaning right out of them.
Walk it off… it will only hurt for a second.

The only thing you can’t let them do
Is sodomize your beliefs
Take away your right to live
The way you feel you should.
Morals are a virtue no one can touch.

America had virtues
But now they just want to take away
Human rights
Your rights to kill yourself
In any way you deem reasonable.

Drugs and drugs and drugs…
Illegal so you can't kill yourself that way.
Suicide, if you fail
You go to jail.
Smoking is not legal inside.
You can’t kill yourself and eat steak.

What it all boils down to
Is that as a grown up
Life is balls.
There is no if ands or buts about it.
It’s just testicles.

But if you have to live life
Live ballsy
Keep them from putting you
In a shell of not caring
Tell them to take their
Bullshit
And suck a dick.

It’s alright to conform in some ways
But if its time to stand out
Than I will stand out…
Its not my fault they can’t control me.
I am my own person
I live the way I want

Careful suggestions
May float out of ones mouth
But I will take those into account
And then decide to shove my foot
In their ass if I don’t
Like it.

Figure out quick which friends
Are friends
And which friends are
Just people who feel like
Being next to you for a moment

A moment where they can
Take, take, take from you
Until you feel drained and
Otherwise dead
Then leave.

Go away and start over
With another person.
They don’t really need you
Forever, just right now.

Then there’s the get away
The moments in your life
Where you realize
You need a play ground
Maybe some construction paper
And crayons

To draw
Whether you can draw or not.
Just expressing yourself
In one of the most
Childish of ways as deemed by
Adults.

Get it out…
Let it out…
Forget to tell it to play nice
With the other kids in the neighborhood
Instead tell it to go kick the
Kid next door’s ass until
He hands over his favorite toys and candy.

Let the world be that canvas
For the art that is your life
If this is made so
No matter what happens
To you
You will know that
Even if you fall down and
Can’t get back up.
Ranting about it can
Always make you feel better

You know why?
Cause making some one else
Feel small is fun but making
The world listen to what you have
To bitch and piss and moan about
Is a much more destructive form
Of entertainment.