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Rated: NPL · Draft · Children's · #2041411
My very first submission for review with grammar flaws and all. The first chapter.
The Adventures of Yates in the Rabbit Hole

Chapter One


Above her she could see light shining through the muscadine vines. She pulled a few fruit off the vine and enjoyed the sweetness as they burst in her mouth. She spread her blanket on the ground and pulled 3 treasures from her bag. It was a rare occasion when she had the opportunity to get away from the others. There were 3 others. Yates had a tough older brother named Ronny who could run faster, jump higher, and whip any boy around, a bossy older sister named Marsha who would never be able to fit down the rabbit hole but would likely stand at the top and nag Yates out if she were found; and a baby brother that usually just served as her dress up doll. Yates found a den underneath the muscadine vines that she was sure only she and the rabbits knew existed. She was small for her age so slipping through the path the rabbits had created was easy; now staying hidden was a different story. She popped the lid off the fruit jar of lemonade she had absconded from the kitchen, took a gulp and lie back upon the blanket to peruse the invaluable items from her bag which were well worn and cherished. First, she would review her tattered copy of “Little Women”. She had read it a half dozen times so she would simply immerse herself in the imagery of the story until her attention was stolen away by a daydream, a screaming sibling, or the sound of her daddy’s voice instructing her to come inside.

She had a particular fondness for Jo because Jo was smart, read books, and longed for adventure. Yates imagined a life of adventure for herself as she placed herself in the book with her favorite character. After what seemed like hours, she drifted off to sleep on her patchwork quilt underneath the muscadine vines. She dreamed. She dreamed of swashbuckling, mystery solving, ballroom dancing, hot air balloon riding, and reading her very own published book…The light was becoming dim through the vines above her but she was not afraid. Yates knew her way around these swamps like the back of her hand and had played in them in the dark many times with her older brother. She lit the lantern that she had hidden under her coat on the way out of the house. The crickets were singing to her as she pulled the second treasure from her bag. This time it would be Miss Marple. Oh, she loved Miss Marple. Miss Marple was her dream of a grandmother and her best friend in crime solving. After solving the mystery on the train, Yates dozed off again with just a sliver of light from above and the light of the lantern softly glowing upon her golden hair.

Yelling. Barking. Gun shots. What was going on above her? She was frightened because she heard the grown men in muffled tones speaking of a stranger, murder, and “on the loose”. They were standing just over her library. She turned the lantern down slowly as not to attract their attention. As the distressed sounding voices of the men and the bellowing of the hounds faded away in the distance, she sat up on her blanket and began to formulate a plan to get from her hideout to the kitchen door of home, some 300 yards away, without being snatched by the murderer on the loose.

She heard foot fall above her….
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