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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2071718-I-Cant-Feel-My-Legs
Rated: E · Poetry · Dark · #2071718
A piece of poetry about my personal struggle with depression.
I Can’t Feel My Legs

By: Roy Fuller


I can’t feel my legs
I know they’re there, but I can’t feel them
They want to move, to stand, to act
But I can’t feel them
It’s like I’m moving on a conveyor belt
My moving done for me
I can’t feel my legs
They’re atrophying before my eyes
I move on a predetermined path
Set by those who designed the belt
Moving in a single direction with no fork
I can’t feel my legs
Get up and move
Leave the belt
Find your own path and use your legs
But I can’t feel them
I can sense them, hear them, see them
But I can’t feel them
This belt is surrounded by walls
I could climb over them
It would be that easy
If I could only feel my legs
How long before they’re unusable?
How long before they wither away?
What can I do to feel my legs again?
My spirit’s chained
Trapped on this belt, within its walls
I could free it
If only I could feel my legs again
Take the hard path
Refuse to ride
But what about those who continue
Those who still ride the belt
Yet can still feel their legs
The ones who aren’t trapped
What will they think of me?
When I can finally feel my legs again
Will they call me a coward?
Will they call me a quitter?
All because they feel what I can’t
I’ve seen where this belt ends
In a tunnel with no opening
And a wheelchair awaits
A final testament
For me to never use my legs again

A man, he sits in the chair
Alone and full of sorrow
Broken dreams and lifeless eyes
A man who has lived his future
According to the path determined
By this belt that was built before him
His legs are transparent
A distant memory
An echo not heard for years
He can’t hear his legs anymore
They don’t speak to him
Their hearts have stopped beating
He let them die
And now he just wishes he had listened
But he can’t hear his legs anymore
He looked at me
His face the same as mine
A face full
Of broken dreams and lifeless eyes
And legs that he can’t hear anymore
He tells me to run
To escape
Before it’s too late
Before I join him
Before I can’t hear my legs anymore
He feigns a smile
He sees potential
Tears stream down his face
It’s all he can do
He failed his legs
But I still have a chance
Before I can’t hear my legs anymore
Don’t settle fort this path
Don’t allow your face to be full
Of broken dreams and lifeless eyes
And allow your legs to speak
To guide you away from this place
Run through the green grass
Taste the blue skies
Feel the warm sun
Walk the path of color
Escape this land of grey
But I must hurry
Before I can’t hear my legs anymore

I can’t let them die
These legs of mine
I have to listen to that man
Listen to my legs again
Don’t make the mistake he made
And follow the path determined
By this belt that was built before me
Don’t settle for this land of grey
One day I hope
I can feel my legs again
Allow them to move freely
Allow them to take me
To guide me to the land
Away from broken dreams and lifeless eyes
A land of color
Of blue skies and green grass
Of a warm sun upon my face
When I can feel my legs again
Ill never renounce them
Never step back on
This belt that was built before me
That leads to broken dreams and lifeless eyes
A land filled with sorrowful streets
And terrible towers
Where people live and ride
On belts that were built before them
Forever wishing
That they could feel their legs again
And yet they resent
Those few that got away
From this belt that was built before them
That leads to broken dreams and lifeless eyes
Through sorrowful streets and terrible towers
Through this land of grey
Away from the land
Of blue skies and green grass
Never feeling the sun on their faces
Forever wishing that
They could only feel their legs again
Away from the wheelchairs and past the walls
That surround this land
Of sorrowful streets and terrible towers
That leads to broken dreams and lifeless eyes
Full of those whose legs are distant echoes
That they’ll never feel or hear again

I have to make it
I have to run
I have to feel my legs
I have to hear their cry
To leave this land
Of broken dreams and lifeless eyes
And leave behind these
Sorrowful streets and terrible towers
To make it to my promised land
Of blue skies and green grass
To abandon this man
With a face the same as mine
Full of broken dreams and lifeless eyes
With a transparent set of legs
That he let die
To ride this belt that was built before him
That took him on the easy path
Through sorrowful streets and terrible towers
To that chair that silenced his legs
And turned them into a distant echo
That he hasn’t heard for years
He wants me to leave
To run toward my promised land
To climb these walls and escape
This land of grey and sadness
To take the hard way out
To listen to these legs of mine
If only I could feel them
Maybe all it takes is a choice
A mat from which to spring
To escape this land
Of broken dreams and lifeless eyes
Far from these sorrowful streets and terrible towers
To a land of blue skies and green grass
To feel the sun upon my face again
I need to tell my legs
And listen to their cry
Let them take me to my promised land
Where I can feel my legs again.
© Copyright 2016 Roy Fuller (fuller at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2071718-I-Cant-Feel-My-Legs