Bubba's Corner BBQ

"Hey Sir, I'm new to town. I've heard a lot of great things about Bubba's Corner BBQ. Do you think you can tell me how to get there from here?"

"Why, of course! Welcome to Townyard Hall. We're glad to have you with us! Now, just follow the riverbank on down to the covered bridge. Cross over the covered bridge, and follow the barbed wire fence around the curve. When you get to the big blue mailbox, you'll want to cross the street and cut through the park. When you get to the other side of the park, park your car on the side of the road, and look for the red brick hardware store and the blue siding fabric store. The tan brick establishment between the two is Bubba's Corner BBQ,"

"Wait a minute. Isn't it on a corner?"

"Oh no, my good man. It hasn't been on the corner for years. A hog got loose from over at Bob's Farm and took off down the middle of town. It must've had ten people chasing it. Well, that hog was so spooked when those double doors to Bubba's Corner BBQ opened up, that hog ran right through the restaurant. It pushed its way through the swinging metal kitchen door and went even wilder when it couldn't find its way out. Bubba opened the back door, and it ran squarely into one of those big smokers he has back there. He must've got a concussion when he hit it the first time because he ran into it two more times! That old hog knocked that smoker slap over! Hot coals and wood went everywhere. No one saw hot wood fly into the trashcan on the inside of the door.

While they were outside trying to clean up the hot mess, flames shot up in the kitchen from the trashcan. No one saw it until it caught some aprons on fire hanging on the wall. Then the hook they were on caught fire, and before you know it, the place was in blazes. The old hog ran back home. He was fine, but Bubba lost his corner that day. Now he's sandwiched between Hardware and Fabric."

404 Words

Written For "The Writer's Cramp - Poetry Week" 
Won 1st Place

Give a tourist directions to "Bubba's Corner BBQ ▼

*Exclaimp* There are stipulations:
*Bulletb* You cannot use the following words: north, south, east, west, left, right, straight

*Bulletb* Tell us why "Bubba's Corner BBQ" isn't on a corner

*Exclaimp* One of your genres must be COMEDY