Im So Tired

I can feel them. I can feel my eyelids closing. I can feel my eyeballs aching and almost imagine the blood shot lines running through them. The time is something o'clock and all around its quiet. Its so quiet except for the humming sounds of the computer and that white noise buzz you get in your ears. It's not been a particularly long day and it's not as though I have done anything stressful but I'm just so damn tired. Maybe it's because I'm a lazy bastard, or maybe it's because I'm finishing my fifth bottle of Stella Artois. Ah precious, sweet beer. Another sip I think is called for. My god even the weight of the (half empty) bottle being lifted to my dry lips is enough to ware me out. I need sleep so badly.
A part of me had promised myself an early night in order to feel refreshed for the, no doubt uneventful, day tomorrow. Yet the other part wanted to stay up late in order to enjoy a lie in the next day. Guess which part won.
Another yawn comes and goes, yet appears to linger for longer than usual. It is my theory that the longer a person holds the yawn, the more tired they are. I believe my theory holds water but I don't need shit like that to know how mind-mushingly tired I am. Another sip of booze. A simple night cap if you will, not that I need it you understand, merely there as a target.
'I will finish this, then off to bed' Yes that seems plausible enough, after all nobody likes waking up next to half drunk, warm beer now do they?
I mean, let's be honest, there is no reason for me to stay up this late. It's not like theres anything on TV. The town centre's not open and even if it were I couldn't drive there 'cos I've had 5 bottles of Stella, oh and I haven't got a license yet. Everybody else is asleep or at the very least tucked up (or some unfortunate fools are unlucky enough to be working a night shift) so there's no one to talk. Nobody on line either because they all have the common sense to go to bed when they are tired. Mmmmmm, more booze. Nearly gone now.
Damn it I'm so tired I don't even know what's going on around me? What the hell is that hissing noise? I think my brains adjusting my mental state in a desperate attempt to tell me to stop torturing it and get some sleep. You know you've got problems when you're own brain is telling YOU what to do and not the other way around. Or is it meant to be like that. I don't know I'm tired to think or even care.
Thank god for that. The last drop of beer from the bottle. I'm tossing the empty remains into the bin behind me. Now me, and the empty bottle, can get some well deserved rest. I would say it's been a real blast writing this to whom it may concern but as you may have gathered from various clues I am quite fatigued and wish to get some slumber. Goodnight all!