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204 Public Reviews Given
204 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Seventh Seal  
for entry " "University"" 
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 18+ | (2.5)
Sadly, I had to drop this down so far because, while I started out really into the chapter, the whole last name thing completely broke my verisimilitude and put me off the tale. While I don't mind characters talking to the reader, breaking the fourth wall if you will (I read The Dresden Files, and it was actually charming how Dresden would throw comments at the reader as if he was chatting with them) this threw me more than I like.
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Review of Seventh Seal  
for entry " Bad Dream" 
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
A captivating start! You have a very nice way with descriptions and putting just enough setting into place so that I have a clear idea of what's going on where, without overdoing it and boring me half-way through. I have a feeling that things will be picking up very past.
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Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
A nice start to the story! I liked the touch of fantasy that the phoenix brought to the tale, and I think you gave it a very unique lore, the whole part about when it burns for the last time, it lays an egg. I can't say I've heard that before. My one question would be if this was suppose to be set in a variant of Earth (Plymouth) or whether it's supposed to be a purely fantasy world. Perhaps some kind of indication of which would help clarify things for a reader.
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Review of Four Way Stop  
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Whoa!!! First I was thinking everything from 'Ok, it's Death on his pale horse and he's coming for her because she's about to die/is dead and doesn't know it yet" thing, then wondered what in the world he wanted with the camera. But the ending, unexpected and jaw-dropping, completely blew me away! I thought that Meervic was someone evil who the knight was chasing, and turns out.... well, I won't spoil it for any other readers. But you completely blindsided me, and I love it when that happens! Wonderful!
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Review of Caged  
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: E | (3.5)
An interesting start. What drew me to this story was the fact that it was in the friendship category, which is something I enjoy.So I have to wonder given how this started out, will the friendship be between the vampire and Raven, or between the son and Raven, and will Damon be able to find his sister in time before she's hurt. Also, that dream definitely is an odd thing. Was this vampire there, I ponder, and if not why exactly was he looking for Raven?

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Review of Reveria Darnithai  
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I'm enjoying this story very much. You have a good way with your descriptions that gives me support to envision the scene, without overdoing it so every detail is laid out an I get bored with it. The plot is interesting, and I like the relationship between Reveria and Ranos. The appearance of her father was a unique one, and I found it a nice twist that to save everyone she must save an evil mage.

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Review of To Be a King  
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
A nice little story, one that I'd honestly enjoy seeing drawn out into a longer work. I think the idea of a kingdom ruled in this way, with magic binding the king to it's needs and desires, an interesting one that I don't recall having heard before. Whoever this new king is, I think he's got the right idea of things. Now here's hoping he never forgets it!

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Review of The Three Swords  
for entry "Premise" 
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Well, I will say this before I read anything, you've already perked my interest with it being about brothers, and especially with what you said about family sticking together. I just hope that the tale itself is as good as I believe it may be.

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Review of Legend of Lucrece  
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Quite an interesting character you've presented here in Lucrece. An elven vampire wizard who, despite his dark nature I can't quite make myself dislike. I have to wonder if he's acting to rid himself of the vampirism, or to augment it with yet more power. A fascinating thought, that.

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Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: E | (3.5)
An interesting, fun little romp, and the ending got a laugh from me. I just saw sitting somewhere, chatting with the narrator, disbelieving the entire thing, then he gets to that last line and an eye peeks in the window or something, haha! About the only think I could think to make it better would've been if the ending was 'he's right behind you,' instead.

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Review of Celesta  
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Ooh! Interesting! I've always been fond of stories where those with magic have to be tested in some way, to either see if they have talent or to evaluate what exactly there talent is. I wonder what it means, if anything, that the red glowed so brightly for her, and if the witch knew the truth about it. I hope there is a continuation!

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for entry "Chapter 1: The Blight" 
Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
A curious start. I like the healing queen, and you put a good amount of work into making your characters feel unique. The queen definitely has the feel of a woman who feels much pain but as a credit to her station in life is putting on a brave front. I'm eager to see where this goes.

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Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I'm rather fascinated with this story. You've presented a vivid world and characters with strong personalities. I'm eager to see where this will lead and the maturing of the friendship between Elias and Kai. I have a fague hunch about the sword, but I'll hold that to myself until I can see if I'm correct, so I don't spoil it for anyone else.

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Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
An interesting start to an interesting story. I like how unique your world feels, with a lovely variety of races interacting with one another. I will admit there were moments when I was confused by things. It would have been nice if there was a little more description or explanation of the races or what some terms meant, maybe a touch of history to the setting beforehand. But that's just my opinion. Regardless of that, I fully will be continuing to read, as I am eager to follow Kalar and meet his friends on this quest for a dangerous book

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Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Ooh, and the plot thickens! So now there's a second culture presented, quite distinctly different from the other. You gave a very solid description of his clothes - I was able to visualize what Ayliah saw easily, which I consider essential. I'm eager to see what happens when our injured friend awakens, and how the two presented characters, whom I will presume are the main two, will find their fates interwoven. (I also have to wonder if a certain lout might not like this turn of events, lol!)


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
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Review by Gelendra
In affiliation with Let's help each other grow...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I simply loved how you presented this world. The terms that were used for more common things (chitter sailers for squirrels, for example) really gave the place flavor and depth. You have a terrific way with giving readers a strong feel for the characters and invoking empathy with him. I was able to grasp his rush of spirit as he ran, his desperation when the storm became too violent, and his grim understanding that to his belief system it was his own pride that got him into this situation (which in a way was true; he -did- go further than he should've). A great start, and I will definitely be reading on!

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
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for entry "Prologue" 
Review by Gelendra
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Oh my gosh.... this chapter was incredibly heroic and painfully heartbreaking. I very nearly teared up at the mental image of a man giving his life for a situation he couldn't have helped, to spare his family like that. The loyalty of the soldiers who stayed was inspiring, and your description of battle wonderful, very defined and easy to imagine. Well done!
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Review by Gelendra
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Just thought I'd say right here, I'm a fan of brothers and twins, so this little blurb caught my attention right away. Though it fills me with a touch of dread, I will say that! You've definitely got the type of plot hook that I look for on the back of books, I will say that!
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Review by Gelendra
Rated: E | (4.5)
An interesting story. It might have been a bit easier to read, at least to me, if there was an extra space between the lines, to separate the paragraphs and spoken lines. Also I saw a place where I don't know if a period or comma would've been better:

She wore blue robes that seemed to flow like water. Her feet bare and free in the lush green grass. (or She wore blue robes that seemed to flow like water, her feet bare and free in the lush green grass. )

I did like the flow of the story, and the shift from a completely third person perspective to first person at the end made it seem like I was sitting at someone's feet, being told the story, a rather nice technique.

I hope to read more soon!
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Review by Gelendra
Rated: E | (5.0)
Simple but oh so true. That's what I've always liked about the classic fairy tales: no matter how dark, everything always turned out good in the end, and you could rest assured on that. Too bad that doesn't happen in the real world. I guess that's what reading is good for!
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Review of True Colors  
Review by Gelendra
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This story was very nice. Well written with very good character descriptions so that each of them were distinct and unique. I really liked how each one seemed to have their own gifts that helped to accomplish their goal. The use of the colors was skillful, how they showed even hidden facets of a person's personality. If I'd have to guess, I'd say Mahir's colors meant loyalty and nobility, or perhaps honor. But that's just my interpretation. And I loved how Kyle, who through much of it seemed to have no gift like the others, ended up being the same as Mahir. This is a fascinating world that I'd love to see more of. Well done!
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