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78 Public Reviews Given
470 Total Reviews Given
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26
26
Review of To My Angel  
Review by ♥Marvelou...
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I thought this was a really nice comforting piece. This was something I needed to read at this moment. I like the way that you incorporated your relationship with God and the fact that he was the one that truly put you two together.

I do feel that the piece could be lengthened by adding more detail between the courtship days and the 39th anniversary (or year) of marriage. I found that I wanted to know more about the marriage. How did God help you through the times? During the rough times? The good times? When did you have to trust in God thge most to get you both through? How did that work?

How come she is your guiding angel? Was it something said or didn't say? What exactly was God's role in this?

This is definitely a good start to a story wanting and waiting to be told. Now keep fleshing out the story. You might find that you hve a publishable piece here in a book such as Chicklen Soup... series.

Good luck and keep writing
Melia
27
27
Review of The Dragon's Wish  
Review by ♥Marvelou...
Rated: E | (5.0)
Very good. I would encourage you to see if you could actually get this published. I did notice a few contraction errors. When doing contractions the rule is do not = don't, is not = isn't etc.

Also in the sentence with the flies fluttering around tongue is spelled wrong the first time mentioned.

These errors are minor so I chose not to rate you down for them. Just re-read the whole story outloud and you will see the minor mistakes.

Good Luck!!!
Melia
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