What a tale of sibling rivalry! It reflects skill in dialogue as well as talent in plot design. Write on! Do you have any other stories in your portfolio?This story reminds me of masterful tales by Edgar Allen Poe. Did you use him for inspiration while writing this?
This is an examination of a topic that will mystify mankind for as long as people roam the earth.
The only thing I suggest is to include some type of autobiographical event that showed you what happiness means to you. Your piece is short enough to allow for some additional meat. Just an idea, some food for thought.
If you wanted to open your story up to contributions from other WDC writers, you could make it into a Campfire Creative. I've never done this, but it could be enlightening and rewarding for anyone who chooses to participate.
A really good story, but it made me want to read more about the two lovers. I can't help wondering what happened next. Have you thought about a part 2 for Daphne Island?
A wonderfully descriptive story. The locale comes alive to the reader. One thing seems to be missing, though. Could you add something to the story line to make the plot more complex? With a more complicated plot, your sweet tale of love could take on new dimensions.
I really enjoyed this. I'd like to see a revision if you do one.
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