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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2275683-Sins-of-the-Mind
by DelK
Rated: E · Other · Experience · #2275683
What happened to those memories?
SINS of the Mind
Not all writers stoop to subterfuge, innuendo, a little intrigue, double-entendre or other nefarious tricks to lure the reader into reading his drab, dreary stuff. This one does. “Sins of the Mind” is meant to suggest I may be about to reveal titillating, juicy bits of salacious behavior or thoughts something along the lines of Jimmy Carters “I have lusted.” You may be sadly disappointed.

I apologize by admitting the title is, sad to say, an example of my attempt at such a trick. There is an unwinding of the ruse to make it legit. What the title ought to say, rather than “Sins of the Mind” is “Sins of the Memory”. But here is how I try to wiggle out of being called a misleading liar. The memory is part of the mind, right? Home free. No purgatory. No damnation to hell!!

Now you are in for it as there is no where to go except to the subject. Alas and alack.

Were there a prosecuting attorney here, the charges against my mind, er, memory, could be malfeasance, non-feasance and misfeasance. It mangles things. My mind tells me Lewis Carroll wrote: “The time has come, the walrus said, to speak of many things. Of ships and sails and puppy dog tails and kings.” That rings right? It may ring but it is as wrong as wrong can be. The correct version of the verse from The Walrus and the Carpenter is:
"The time has come,' the Walrus said, To talk of many things: Of shoes — and ships — and sealing-wax —Of cabbages — and kings —And why the sea is boiling hot And whether pigs have wings.'"

A slam dunk for conviction on that one. The same is true of the words to the song, "Detour". It was sung often in our hearing as a kid. It took a while for the meaning to sink in and it was more apropos than ever. But my dad gum memory tells me: “Detour, there’s a muddy road ahead. Detour. All these bitter things I find. Should have read that detour sign.” Nope. Wrong again. The correct version is: Detour, there's a muddy road ahead, detour. Paid no mind to what it said. Detour, oh these bitter things I find, Should have read That detour sign"

Now for the punch line, or what passes for one. By way of background, my dad was not a joke teller and, for the most, part, laughed only at stuff he heard from the Jack Bennys and Red Skeltons of the world. But, there was one and, as far as my memory goes, only one laugh he got from the line in what must have been a commercial for some product for women. Wish to HIGH heaven my memory could come up with the first part of the laugh-producer, but sad to say, its gone just can’t find it after searching both my mind and the internet. Sad, I know that my mind is sinning against me. As best my mind can resurrect the thing, it had to go along the lines of lamentation for the life of a lady who was bereft of a satisfactory social life and lived a life deprived. That is until of course, she came to use the wonderful product and came the concluding line, “Now, there is wash on her line all the time.”
Dad would laugh uproariously at each and every hearing. Those were days when sly innuendo and insinuation were used regularly.

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