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Journal entries of my life as a writer. |
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This is a journal of my writing life since I joined the Writing.com community of writers. This is such a different place for me, I think it's a good idea to document my new writing adventures. |
June 28 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS"  Procrastination: fatal flaw or a necessary evil? This is an interesting prompt. I do believe there is strategy having to do with timing, but simply waiting until the last minute to do everything and possibly not doing anything due to running out of time, just doesn't sound good. It's not a wise strategy. I have found that doing things right away is sometimes the only way I get things done. I have issues with remembering to do things, so there are some things I like to do as soon as possible, while I can still remember what it is. Some things I try to do as soon as possible because they are important to me and I don't want to run out of time to do them. But there are times when I just don't feel well and there are times when other things come up. I believe waiting until the last minute can be a fatal flaw. What if the rescuers don't get to the victim in time? Someone could die. Does it ever pay to go as slow as possible in an emergency? Does it really help a person when you say you don't have time to assist them? I know not all things can or are done in a timely manner, but how is it better to do things as slowly as possible, not out of strategy, but because of laziness? |
| June 28 Blogging Prompt for "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" Differences and similarities: which divides us more? This is difficult. It makes more sense to say that differences divide us more, but variety is the spice of life. Life would be dull if everyone was exactly the same. They say opposites attract. If the similarities were bad things, then the similarities would create more bad and build off of each other. If the similarities were good things, then it could be okay as long as there were other things that weren't the same so there could be something to share. I feel all mixed up on this one. Let's look for how our differences and similarities can bring us together. I don't like seeking to divide people. I would rather work to unite people for the common good to further the society for the betterment of all. |
| June 28 Blogging Prompt for "Blogging Circle of Friends " You're stranded in a foreign city for a day with no money and no friends. Where do you go; what do you do? This is really scary. My first thought is food. If it's only one day, then I can suffer through a day without food, but this sounds serious enough to be more than one day, so I would have to form a long term plan. I would see what I could do to get a job at some kind of restaurant because they usually offer free food to the workers, so I would at least have one meal each day. If I was truly stranded, then I would have to build a new life in order to survive. The problem with it being a foreign city is that I might not know the language and people might be cruel to a foreigner. I would never want to be in this horrible situation set up for suffering. |
| June 27 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" Where do you find solace? I had to think about this one for a while. I would like to find comfort. But for now, my writing and artwork are therapy and I find release and escape in writing and I feel at peace when I paint, draw or sew. So I find solace in my creative activities. They mean a lot to me. I recently started hand sewing crazy quilt squares and got back to my drawings and paintings. I feel like I have things to keep me busy now. Of course there is always my never ending to-do list for educational materials to also keep me quite busy. It feels good with every single one I create and post to my yellow website. That website is my baby. https://www.edonyourown.com |
| June 27 Blogging Prompt for "Blogging Circle of Friends " For vacations, do you prefer middle-of-nowhere or urban areas? I actually enjoy both. But I get scared about this these days since my stalkers have wanted me to die on the side of the road, which would require middle-of-nowhere and they also want to get me lost in Los Angeles, which is big and possible. They really want me to have no way of getting any assistance of any kind. Oh well... on I march into the future. |
| June 27 Blogging Prompt for "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" Third time is the charm. What does that mean to you? Well... I've lived with men two times, so the next time would be the charm because it would take a charm for another guy to want to live with me now that things are such a mess. The first guy was my husband and we lived together for seven years. The second one was my tech support guy and that lasted a year, but I helped him get past the first time, so he went on to find a wife and they had a baby boy. The third one will be interesting. I've already had two guys say they wanted to live with me. One says he's in too much physical pain to talk to me anymore and he freaked out about the stalking disaster. I told him the key is to not lwt them inside. They rely on having a way in with a key or an unlocked door because for some reason they think that makes it legal because someone said it was okay to perform illegal medical procedures on me without my permission. The second one turned out to be an international confidence scheme. So that's two down... I'm looking for that double charm third. Do you know anyone? Actually, based on what I was told yesterday, I might have a way out of the nursing home. I'm hoping it actually comes through. There are some things that have to be done first, but maybe this will end up being a good thing. A guy doesn't automatically come with this option... Oh well... |
| June 26 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" Odds are we're going to be... Odds are we're going to be in for a bumpy ride. Life has so many different obstacles and hurdles and hoops to navigate. Can anyone say they have a perfect life? Can't we always count on challenges? Doesn't life throw us curve balls all the time? The real trick is making it through the obstacle course with a smile and a laugh and a whole lot of love in your life. Live life to the fullest in the best way possible. Enjoy. |
| June 26 Blogging Prompt for "Blogging Circle of Friends " Funniest thing you have seen recently. People post funny things on Facebook. There are these cards with 1950's graphics and today's comments which can be very funny. There was one about substandard workers in the workplace that I laughed out loud at. People's work ethics just aren't as good as they used to be with some people. There was a picture of an orange kitten hugging a black kitten trying to tell the black kitten that he wasn't bad luck. I really liked that. Then there was a picture of a cat being fascinated with a butterfly. It was cute, but I thought it had to be an enhanced photo because I couldn't believe there would ever be a butterfly who would snuggle up to a cat. I still liked it. There was a picture of a cat in the rain looking in the window with the caption of how the cat thought the wet pussy joke was funny, but he wanted to be let into the house. There was a photo of a girl squinting like she didn't understand something with a caption talking about being around people who were so stupid they made you squint. I know it's not good to laugh at mentally challenged people, but I did like it anyway. I'm not perfect. There are others, but I can't think of them right now. There are funny movies, too, but I haven't been to the movies in a while. |
| June 26 Blogging Prompt for "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" Take the first sentence from your favorite book and make it the first sentence of your blog entry. Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. I don't have a favorite book, but I always thought Fuzzy Wuzzy was a fantastic name for a character in a children's book. I did find the book Outliers very interesting that anyone can get good at something if they try hard enough and practice enough. They even said it worked for writers. Terman's Kids sold only through the Stanfor Bookstore was written by a Stanford professor about one of his colleagues tainting the data of his own study. It was about a study done in my dad's generation where the professor tracked geniuses throughout their lives trying to prove smart people are always high paid and successful. He tried to help the ones who were struggling to get the results he wanted. I found it very interesting that based on his measure of success, it came out fifty fifty with half of the geniuses meeting his criteria and the other half falling below his standards. Some of them went to war and some of them were artists. Those people didn't meet his idea of what a genius should do with their life. When I was growing up, the expectation was to be a doctor or a lawyer. No other options were allowed. Later when I dropped out of college because my dad wouldn't allow me to take an accounting class, he finally said being a CPA would be acceptable. Being a teacher like my grandma was never considered acceptable to my family. Why don't people want smart teachers? |
| June 25 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" Free Prompt I feel like these days of free prompts are perfectly aligned with my needing them. I guess some people dropped out of the challenge and don't know it's their turn to post the prompts. I on the other hand am taking my day of rest today and I'm not in the mood for much of a challenge just this second. Catch me in a few more minutes and I'll be ready to go. I guess my family takes more of a toll on me than I realize. I know the sunburn adds to it, but I just feel worn out from being on my best behavior and keeping my mouth shut and making sure I dodge the bullets heading my way. I guess I showed people how I work with kids in the past two days. I showed people how I handle my mom and my grandma as well. My time with my sister-in-law was mostly just the two of us, except for when she told me about the Easter celebration I didn't get invited to. That slip was in front of others. Oh well... Maybe my family showed people how they are with me. Even if I'm the only one who notices, that's still one person who knows. |
| June 25 Blogging Prompt for "Blogging Circle of Friends " The word for Wednesday is halcyon. When it is an adjective, it means calm, peaceful, tranquil, prosperous or golden. When it is a noun, it refers to a genus of bird or a bird from a fable. Write and have fun. This is a very intetrsting prompt. I like the idea of building vocabulary, since I always thought of my vocab as being not very good. When I got out of high school and started meeting other people, I finally realized I had been comparing myself to some of the smartest people I may ever know and compared to normal average everyday folks, I actually have a pretty good vocabulary. It's not as good as I would like it to be, but oh well... I set my standards pretty high for myself. It's so bad that one of my bosses actually told me not to expect as much out of others as I expect out of myself. As far as halcyon goes, I have only ever heard it used in the phrase halcyon skies. I had the basic concept of the word from the context, but I have never looked it up, so this is cool. I don't have much more to say on the topic at the moment, but the bird from a fable concept sounds like a great writing prompt. Maybe I'll feel more inspired when I'm not feeling so worn out. The story is starting to nag at me now... fabled bird, fabled bird... |
| June 25 Blogging Prompt for "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" I'm a nurse. What's your super power? I work as a QMA (like a nurse) in mental health and you don't have to be Batman or Superman to have super powers. Have fun with this. I am a teacher. My super power is being able to help people through education. Even though I don't have a classroom full of children anymore, I continue to help others with my educational materials. Maybe I'm able to help even more people by fighting the war on ignorence from the rear. My materials work with a variety of ages and ability levels. Just change the expectations for the student work. A high end student will do more than a low end student, but they can all feel like stars because they achieved success with what they were able to accomplish. |
 In my two days with my family, the low point was my mother laughing at the fact that I used to teach math. Math was my best subject growing up. Why would it be a joke that I would end up being a math teacher? They say that emotional abuse is actually worse than physical abuse because the scars are deeper. My mom drinks vodka heavily these days, so maybe she has just forgotten about my chilhood. I remember her reaction when I told her I was going to teach a beginning sewing class. I thought she would be proud of me since she was the one who taught me how to sew in fourth grade. She thought my teaching sewing was a joke, too. I once told someone I live in a fantasy world. He didn't understand what I meant by that. I meant that I just pretend that my family is normal as a way to cope, because the reality is too painful. |
| June 24 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" Free Prompt I made it through day two and day three is cancelled because I only had a one way ride. I now have a lovely sunburn on my face and arms. I think my legs might be okay. Today was another beach day and the kids found a huge pile of kelp to drag around with the help of the waves lifting it. They also dug for sand crabs and found several. I overheard a snippet of conversation about me. This is part of how I find out what's brewing. Someone wanted to know why I was allowed to be with children because they heard I was a child molester. She was told I was with my family. She thought it was my family who said I was a child molester. And so goes my life... She said all I do is watch the kids. She said she heard I worked for the Girl Scouts as a camp counselor. The guy told her I worked with kids for years with no problems. He said they should have left me working with kids if they wanted to catch me doing wrong with kids. People eventually figure it out that there are reasons why our rights must be upheld. |
| June 24 Blogging Prompt for "Blogging Circle of Friends " Does music speak to you or is it just noise? How can music be just noise? Even listening to a classical concert band all individually warming up simultaneously has a beauty all its own. I used to love listening to that chaos when I played flute in school. I just loved being part of a large group of people all working so hard to be the best they could be to make the group sound fantastic. I love classical music best, but everything else runs a close second. I'm an eclectic listener. I truly believe music is its own form of magic. When we got to the music section of physics class, I marveled at the science of music. Learning about sound waves and how instruments worked to make those perfect tones blew me away. I wondered how on earth people could even make the wind instruments. The string instruments seemed easier to craft, yet they have their own art form as well. There are so many different genres of music. I love listening to live and recorded music. There are professional misicians I grew up with and I wish I could make it to their performances. The french horn player is a singer and has a different name now. There are others who play in rock bands at local places. One guy playes in an alumni band from his old college marching band days. I thought it was cool several of the people in my high school marching band went on to college marching bands. I opted not to do that where I went because the band had such a bad reputation. I took beginning piano instead for my fine arts requirement. I could write and write about how much I love music. I can still remember most of what I learned about playing the flute and I've played on and off over the years. If I had the situation, I would get another flute and go back to practicing the exercises in those music books I remember from years ago. I would go back to working solo pieces just in case I ever needed to audition to be in a band or orchestra. I was never the best flute in the section, but I still enjoy playing. I got to be second chair and I got to be the section leader for the second flutes. I liked second flute parts better than the first flute parts anyway. I like playing the low notes better than playing the shrill high notes. They are so mellow and rich. |
| June 24 Blogging Prompt for "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" What kind of world would this be if there was no humor? No humor? Sorry... That's no world I want to be part of. That would be such a sad place with fewer ways to cheer people up and no such thing as the best medicine is laughter. Dismal is the word that comes to mind. I don't even want to write any more about it. It's just so tragic. |
| June 23 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" Free Prompt Long day... I got up early this morning to take care of some tasks I wanted to get done for sure. Then I pulled out three of my books published this year and my artwork and waited. I sent out a text real early to ask who would pick me up and when, so no one would forget to include me in the family gathering. I got picked up and I got to see my mom and my grandma, my cousins from Virginia and my brother and his kids. Later I got to see my mom's husband and my sister-in-law. We hung out and had lunch, then off to the beach and the Santa Monica Pier amusement park. I got to tell my sister-in-law that I haven't seen her for the whole year I've been in the nursing home. It felt good to rub that and my books and my artwork in her face. I was mad at her and I wanted to show her she isn't being supportive of me in any way. I have issues with my brother's wife. I don't remember the last time I stood with my feet in the water at the ocean. It was fun to have that experience again. I had the pleasure of holding my two year old nephew while he cried because he missed his dad. My brother was taking my niece on the ferris wheel. They actually called the security folks because I was holding a crying child. I felt like asking them if they wanted to take a turn trying to calm him down. I was super happy when my brother showed up again so I could hand over the little darling. I wonder what will happen with the family visit tomorrow. I had to ask when they would pick me up so they didn't forget to include me. I had to beg someone to visit me for my birthday, so I'm used to out of sight, out of mind. I am very tired right now. Today felt like it lasted forever. To top it off, I was starting to feel woozy part way through the day. |
| June 23 Blogging Prompt for "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" Tell about a time you ran away from something or someone. I must do a lot of running because I have three items in my portfolio having to do with running away from people; my family, my ex-husband and my stalkers when I left my cabin in the woods. Unfortunately I started running in 2006 when I left my home and I ran from Santa Monica to Long Beach to South Dakota back to Santa Monica in Southern California and I've been in the Los Angeles area ever since. With all of those relocations, I only managed to get away from my stalkers for brief periods of time. The research corporation that botched the study on me is just too big. I've given up on outrunning them and my focus is on clean up to get them taken away from me. Any work I need to do to get them to be arrested and convicted is my focus. The law suits are an added bonus that I've also given up on ever seeing. The people involved just don't want me to have the restitution. They thought I would be dead by now, so they saw no point. Living well is the best revenge. I do my best to live the best life I can.
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| June 23 Blogging Prompt for "Blogging Circle of Friends " Who shows you the way? This is an interesting prompt. I realize many people could say their deity or religious text shows them the way, but I'm not religious. Some people say I'm a spiritual person. I have been through some very difficult times and I have looked for ideas on how to handle things, so others have given me written strategies to consider. So I have taken my direction from others as training material. I have also listened to what people have said and sometimes I take my lead from those people. But the bottom line is that I am the one who sets my own sail. I'm the one who shows myself the way in the end. I'm the one who makes the final decision to follow others or make my own path to follow. |
| June 22 Blogging Prompt for "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" I'll follow along and do a free prompt for today. I found out I'm being blocked from viewing web pages at the proxy server level on multiple Wi-fi access points. I figured out it has to be a block at the server level and not a virus on my laptop. I even talked to Microsoft about the issue. So now I have to decide how to handle the situation with work arounds with library computers or try to explain the tech issue to people who know no tech, like a librarian or a coffee shop owner. How far will that go? Oh well... My favorite cousin is coming into town tonight. I hardly ever get to see her family, so the kids are a lot bigger than last time. So picking me up and dropping me off at the nursing home becomes an issue. I hardly see my family in the area now that I'm at the nursing home. So the next few days will be stressful since I have issues with several family members. I'll just have to see how that goes. Wish me good luck. Today has been really difficult. But I got to talk with a very nice guy who wanted to chat my ear off, so that was a nice change. I couldn't believe what all he had been up to lately. He was mentally challenged and was doing so well, it was amazing. It added a smile to my day. People say I'm retarded and they don't even understand how high functioning retarded people can be. If they truly classify me as retarded because of brain damage I've suffered as a stalking victim, then I qualify as very high functioning. It's so hard to fathom what is said about me. The stuff doesn't make sense all pulled together. They contradict themselves. |
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