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 |  I've maxed out. Closed this blog. |
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This is a way of making myself write something coherent and grammatically correct almost every day. I'm opinionated and need an outlet. I'm also prone to flights of fancy. Thanks for stopping by. |
| I'm done with my Christmas shopping. I have a book for every adult, and a Little Golden Book for each of 4 preschoolers (along with child size musical instruments). We can get together a month or so after Christmas and have a big book exchange! I admit it was tough trying to pick something each one would like. Personalizing a book choice requires knowing what captivates that person.I have one on my list who doesn't like reading much, so he might get a DVD movie version of a book. And then I got a very high recommendation of a book this morning, after I made all those purchases. Now I'm not done. My dad wants to do traditional gifting, and he can't drive after dark. So I will have to take him shopping. I'll wrap mine and his. I'm hoping some of those books will pass back by my way. |
| I have a friend and co-worker who just got his citizenship papers Friday. He is so proud. I am so happy for him. He's a great guy. This man was a teacher who became dispossessed. He was of Nepali descent and lived in Bhutan where thousands of people were turned out of their homes and lifestyles overnight. Many of these young Nepali people arriving now in the U.S. are in their twenties or early thirties, and they have never known peace or security until arriving here. My friend escaped with his family to Burma where they lived in a refugee camp until finally being able to relocate to another country. While in the camp, he was a social worker, and was responsible for 10,000 people on a daily basis getting supplies and food. That means he had to be organized, efficient, calm, and he had to delegate and supervise. Here in America he has no recognized skills, only his experience. He took a job as a housekeeper, and worked hard, no nonsense. He worked his way up in management, and has won the respect of his own people who obey him and follow his directions, and all the others under him and other management. I prefer to deal with him than the American born managers because he keeps his promises, is respectful, and always meets his deadlines. The other legal immigrants look up to him as a role model. He is a leader in every sense. He has worked hard to pass his tests and meet all his requirements of citizenship. Most of us take our citizenship and our privileges for granted. But he has worked for his. He has earned the title "American". I am so happy for him and all that he has accomplished.He sees America as the land of opportunity. People like him give the rest of us hope and inspiration that we can have better lives if we work for it. Our dreams can be realized. |
| There is an excellent organization called Heifer International. It operates on the principle of "Give a man a fish, he eats one meal. Teach him to fish, and he eats a lifetime." Heifer buys animals and teaches people how to care for them, feed the family, and maybe make a profit. You can donate the cost of an actual heifer or a share of a heifer ($500 vs $50), or some other animal. For instance goats are popular with children led families (orphans); the goats provide more milk than the children need to drink. The extra milk can be sold or made into cheese.The goat produces manure for the vegetable gardens. And a goat will have two or three kids a year. They can sell the kids, or if able to handle a flock, start a small dairy, and thereby get out of poverty. Llamas, pigs, ducks, chicks, even water buffalo have use in countries all over the world. The donor can choose by country or animal. Or a donor can give an honor card. Think of the teachers who get so many useless and repetitive gifts. But for $10, you can give a share of rabbits or a share of a sheep in her name.You can give a whole flock of chicks for $20! In Guatemala, they even have a honeybee project, where people learn to manage bees and harvest honey. A side effect is that the bees pollinate the coffee trees so the small farmers will produce more coffee. While providing food and income through animals, Heifer International attempts to preserve the ecology, to be organic, and protect the peasants from intrusive tourism. Because clean water is so scarce, they also provide irrigation pumps. I'm impressed by the use of biogas stoves. Since most cooking in places where Heifer works is on wood stoves, biogas offers an alternative to deforestation. These stoves operate on methane from the waste from those animals! The stoves are reliable, safe, and efficient.Yet another way the animals help villages and remote areas of impoverished people. If you're interested, you can contact www.heifer.org. This might be better than any other attempt to address world hunger. |
| It's A Wonderful Life is a great and timeless movie that makes us wonder about the significance of our lives.Many of us never figure out what we're good at or what our passions are. So we don't see the value in ourselves. I heard a story earlier today of a successful businessman who said, "I just make labels. I've made a lot of money, but that's all I do. I don't have any passions. I've never made a difference." A week later someone asked how his week had been since their last discussion. He told how he had helped one of his employees who had been arrested. He bailed him out, talked with him, and helped him clean up his act, and was trying to get him back in the saddle. That made him happy. His friend pointed out that he had found his passion. Once he realized it, he started making a habit of it, helping people to start over again and clean up their act.It was there all along, but he hadn't realized it was his gift. Not all parents are good parents, but many can feel like their lives were important because they raised good kids.People who care for their aging parents can feel like they are important; their lives made a difference. Many, hopefully most, teachers have made a significant contribution to other people's growth and development. The point is you don't have to win a Nobel Prize or discover a cure for the common cold or find the solution to war or plague to have a significant life. In fact, people have won awards, medals, fame, popularity, and fortune, and still felt empty inside. They may have made great achievements in science, or art, or politics and still feel bitter, lonely, and unappreciated. Discover what makes you feel good, what gets you excited, what is your passion, what feels rewarding.Then you will feel successful. Your life will have meaning. |
| Sunday, Nov. 16, is the 86th birthday of one of my favorite actors, Clu Gulager, 86 is a pretty significant birthday! He hasn't been as active lately, but at one time, he was quite prolific. He starred as Billy the Kid in a 1960's half hour show called The Tall Man, also starring Barry Sullivan as Pat Garrett. It wasn't historically accurate, but it did a great job portraying the relationship between the lawman and his young friend.Both actors were older than the characters they portrayed, but that brotherliness and loyalty came through.It was more of a stretch for Clu in his 30's to play a teenager turned man, but he pulled it off. His habits were consistent from episode to episode. I've watched them back to back. The repetitive music starts to drive you crazy, but the stories are good. He played deputy Emmet Ryker for a few years on The Virginian. A few years earlier, he was a guest on The Virginian as a deaf mute, one of my favorite episodes. It was called "Run Silent" and was well written; it's a wonderful romance. I was thinking about how well constructed the show was, how joyful and victorious the ending was. A romance ended in a wholesome way, unlike today's stories, but it made you feel so good. Then it hit me, this man did this without ever making a sound. It was all movement and facial expression. It was wonderful.You totally sympathized with the deaf mute and were happy for him. Then there was Abilene in The Last Picture Show, which won so many awards and boosted a lot of young careers like Timothy Bottoms and Jeff Bridges. One look on his face reminded Sam the Lion he had to pay on a bet. Abilene was self-centered and shallow and tough. Clu pulled it off. He starred with Lee Marvin and Angie Dickinson and many others. He had a lead role on Alfred Hitchcock. He was the normal guy in The Return of The Living Dead. (Fans are quick to point out that it's not a sequel but a spoof of The Living Dead.) So you can see the wide range of roles he's played, and a variety of genres. He did a short film with Sage Stallone using their own family members for various roles. He did a splendid and heart wrenching job in that, too. He's a man of many talents.A few have said that he may be an artistic genius, a little ahead of his time. His whole family is talented and immersed in show business. In fact, he has very strong family values and remains very close with his grown children. It's said that he doesn't smoke or drink. To top it off, he was married to the same woman for over half a century! Now that makes for a Hollywood unique character. Perhaps his down to earth values and work ethic come from his youth, mending fences and herding cattle. We can't neglect that he served his country through the marines. Yes, this is one celebrity who deserves a little attention and some good wishes. He's never been in the tabloids and seems to be a humble person. So, Clu, wherever you are on Sunday, I hope many people wish you well, and that you have a wonderful birthday celebration. Maybe someone will even see this blog and tell you that people are still writing about you. You've delighted many fans on the big screen and the little screen for decades. We're still enjoying the reruns. I, for one, hope there are more creative projects yet to come from you. |
| Today a local radio station was entertaining thoughts from the public on a dilemma one couple shared with them: They had a close friend who wanted to adopt a dog, but couldn't pay the dog breeder's fee of $200. They felt sorry for her and gave her the money. Now they are angry to find out that she didn't adopt a dog, but kept the money. They want to confront her and wanted advice. The majority of people called in saying it was a gift, let it go, don't ask for it back, even though a number of those sympathized with the couple. One wise person said that if you value the friendship, converse with her, rather than confront her. They could convey their disappointment and might find out she had good reasoning, or help her see their perspective in the least, but still remain friends. Almost no one said to ask for the return of the money or to rebuke her openly. I applaud their restraint. I especially appreciate the man who gave advice: before making a specific gift or loan, evaluate whether it is an appropriate gift. In this case, if the woman couldn't afford the adoption fee, how was she going to pay the vet, buy food, treats, and deal with the losses incurred by the housebreaking of a puppy? It would be an ongoing expense she couldn't afford. I have known many people to make gifts or loans for specific reasons and then be disappointed by the recipient. A grandmother gave a married granddaughter money for her to take her husband out for a nice dinner, but they used it to pay bills. The grandmother became upset and wouldn't give any more gifts, although she could easily afford them. I've seen people give money to someone who had lost a job, or buy groceries for a family, then get upset because they bought cigarettes or still had cable TV. If you give a gift, you must expect it to be used however they like, unless you lay down hard guidelines. If there are strings attached, you must list them clearly. You can have this $200 but only if you spend it on car repairs. Anything left over from the repairs must be returned to me. Or you can have this $200 for groceries, but you cannot use any of it for sodas, beer, cigarettes, magazines, or pet food, or you will have to return the money. We have to understand that a gift is a gift, and we can't control it. We can't expect people to read our minds; so if we have a conditional gift, we have to spell out the ground rules.You can't give a child a new toy, expect him to keep it in perfect condition, then get mad when he breaks it and refuse to give him another toy ever. With grown-ups, we use money instead of toys, but it's the same principle. The recipient will use the gift as he pleases, which may displease us. We have to consider whether it is an appropriate gift before we give it. We have to make our expectations very clear, and be prepared to be disappointed. The alternative is to be stingy and never gift. |
| It's amazing how staring at a computer for long periods of time can wear you out. I've been leading employees through open enrollment for next year's insurance. You would think more of them would be computer savvy, but most have come to me to do it for them. IT's a slow tedious process, and I have to make the same speeches over and over. I carry eye drops with me to help my tired eyes. I stand up just to let the blood flow occasionally. I am working overtime, but the only exercise I'm getting is running 5 blocks to the bus in the morning, and walking from building to building several times a day and going up steep stairs to get people who can't leave their work areas long. Then when I get home, I'm writing my story and reading email.I'm exhausted way before my regular bedtime. I wake up tired. I yawn all day. Only a few more days, and the enrollment will be over. That's a little scary, because I'm no where near through the whole list of names. I hate for them to miss the opportunity. On the other hand I've had people change their minds several times. One lady had me redo hers six times, and print new papers. One woman broke down crying because insurance is so expensive. The price increase for 2015 is bigger than the raise they got in 2014. She's worried about how she's going to handle that much out of her paycheck and still buy medicine and pay rent. Others, even with babies, can't get assistance because they're working. It does seem like working people are penalized. The ones who help themselves don't get any breaks. After Monday, I swear I'm going to start exercising again. I won't be working as much. I'll still be writing. I'll be cleaning house and cooking. I'll be sleeping, too. |
| I'm old enough to recall when the band director said his concert always kicked off the local Christmas season. That was generally around Dec.6. He didn't count Santa showing up the day after Thanksgiving at the only shopping center just at the city limits.That big to-do was sort of new about the time he said that, and his band was a part of that, too. The concert always ended with White Christmas, not counting encores, with snow falling from the ceiling. School boys climbed into the catwalk and cast flaked Styrofoam onto the stage. Snow piled up on music stands, the shoulders of the director and players, and cascaded into the audience. It was grand fun. It was cool. It was hard work for somebody. It represented a lot of planning and coordination. It wasn't a big money maker, but it packed a full house. Now the Christmas Season begins right after Halloween. My city had the downtown lights up and turned on the first of November.The Hallmark Channel is running Christmas movies to celebrate their ornament sales. The cable channels that are usually empty are broadcasting Christmas music. I'm planning ahead personally, just to avoid the stress and last minute shopping and other errands. But no decorations are going up, no cards being sent out, until it's timely. That will also have me ready for the charities in which I participate. I just can't work on so little sleep any more. But Nano will be over by then, and I plan to make it a ritual to have some quiet time each day and reflect on the season, to do something celebratory each week after Thanksgiving, even if it's just small. I'm not going to let it be Christmas before it's supposed to be Christmas. |
| When I was a kid, the holidays were exciting. I guess that is why I still get excited, even though things are very different.Stores weren't open on Sunday when I was young. So we could go to special church events which almost always had music at the center, or band concerts, or plays. Then there were afternoons spent decorating for the plays and concerts with school chums. I walked home from school, so I could go downtown and shop by myself (8th grade and up). Mom didn't work until I got out of high school, so she was always there ready to decorate or sing with hot cocoa or bake something special. My brothers and I did crafts together. It just always seemed like a long season of celebrating and fun. Now most women work. How do they find time with housework and errands to do anything special with the kids? How do they support them in their clubs, school, or church? Even for me now with no kids, the season is over before I feel ready. I frequently have my cocoa and singing sessions after Christmas is over. I sit down with my spiced tea and listen to Christmas CD's in January, when there's no company, no deadlines. I have to forego a lot of concerts and special events for other responsibilities in November and December. I'm not doing Operation Christmas Child this year (I am donating money for shipping). I'm planning the Thanksgiving meal to be as simple as humanly possible, no perusing of magazines for new recipes or decorating ideas. I refuse to go out of town for anything. The stress distracts me from the holidays. I'm shopping online to avoid parking and traffic and crowded stores. I want to find some of that glow, that excitement again. It doesn't involve money, or glitz or fashion. It might be homespun or simple. It's definitely something you feel. And you just can't feel it when you're rushed or stressed or pressured. |
| I've tried to avoid this subject, but tonight nothing else comes to mind. I'm sorry to be insensitive and politically incorrect, but here goes. To reduce the population increase, more men need vasectomies. Period. Men on welfare should not be having more than two children. Playas need to stop after two, or before one. Immigrants on Medicaid, with or without jobs need to have vasectomies. They can be reversed once they are employed, married, and are buying a home. It is much easier on a man than it is for a woman to have her tubes tied, and it is much cheaper for the man. We obviously are not going to be able to instill morality or monogamy within one generation, so vasectomies are the next best choice. Sex education and free condoms have not worked. People are not afraid of disease, but have to get their jollies no matter what the cost. Prisoners and illegal aliens should have no choice. Taxpayers do not have an endless supply of money to support children of irresponsible men. These children will not receive good education or moral training. Women who have more than four children, and do not have an income over $50, 000 a year should be strongly encouraged to have her tubes tied. The woman who had 15 children, 9 with one man,complained about no one supporting her kids while her "man" was in jail, should be fined per child, instead of getting free hand-outs. Only she is responsible for having so many children. She could have said "No" before each one was conceived. Her man was only able to support her with his drug money. He should have paid to have her 'fixed' after he had 4 kids with her, let alone 9. I do not favor sterilizing handicapped people or retarded people. I am in favor of forcing people of a right mind to do the right thing, exercise self-control or birth control or get vasectomies. It's not fair to the next generation, to the overpopulated earth, or to taxpayers to go on recklessly having kids with no restraints. |
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